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The Life Of I
Contributed by
Mortis-Dark
on
Monday, 6th September 2004 @ 06:04:27 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
My blood parts the sea.
For those who dont know me.
I am the abundant source of light.
Your sun and moon.
Taking time for you apologies.
Making plans to slip off the edge.
Solitary imprisonment.
Taking your own life.
Leaving the cool colors.
Orange and black.
Ive got a big bucket of problems.
I wish you would.
No sense is nonsense.
Shaking and trembling.
Waking next to nothing.
Waking up to nothing.
Im planning my own revenge.
Red eyes on a grey horizon.
Copyright ©
Mortis-Dark
... [
2004-09-06 18:04:27]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The Life Of I
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 6th September 2004 @ 06:15:14 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
| It's almost...mmm... sunset rather than 'dark'. I like the metaphor - feel like "slipping off" myself right about now. Short and very cool poem. |
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Re: The Life Of I
(User Rating: 1 )
by waos on
Monday, 6th September 2004 @ 06:23:41 PM AEST
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a Message)
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ya, it was good.. different than some stuff i've read and that's always refreshing. good job.
~Jekyll/waos |
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Re: The Life Of I
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Monday, 6th September 2004 @ 09:59:15 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| welcome back. =] powerful, and this is kind of a philosophical write. |
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Re: The Life Of I
(User Rating: 1 )
by Luinil on
Monday, 6th September 2004 @ 10:07:19 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| ooh very unique and kind of spooky... look forward to reading more... great write* |
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Re: The Life Of I
(User Rating: 1 )
by Lee on
Monday, 27th September 2004 @ 07:31:26 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Poet at Industrial Colosseums Unbound
Says:
Good visual imagey, well written free verse, and good word usage "trembling"!
Jolly Good Show! |
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Re: The Life Of I
(User Rating: 1 )
by Lee on
Monday, 27th September 2004 @ 07:32:52 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Poet at Industrial Colosseums Unbound
Also says:
You should write the sequels: "The Life of Me", and "The Life of Myself".
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