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Marathon
Contributed by
fionndruinne
on
Monday, 30th August 2004 @ 02:12:22 PM in AEST
Topic:
StoryPoetry
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A sighing sound of washing waves
Alight with Oriental gleam
Was sounding with the dawning day
On pale sands of Marathon.
The golden sunlight kindled fire
Of Oceanus’ eastern spray
And in six hundred spreading sails
Of Persian ships in mighty fleet.
The landed host assembled there
Below the Parnes’ rugged heights
A vast and daunting army made
To crush the last of Grecian hopes.
Alone stood Athens in the fight
With desperate courage marching forth
With Miltiades at their head
His scarlet-crested helmet bright.
At Marathon was battle waged
The Greeks a tenth of all their foes
The strife was long and terrible
Upon the trampled, reddened plain.
At last the frenzied Grecian blades
Made chaos of the Persian lines
And drove them shattered to their ships
With slaughter on the wave-washed sands.
Soon darkness fell upon the field
The Grecian army rested there
But in the night the Persian fleet
For unprotected Athens sailed.
The watchers in the coastal hills
Relayed the dire news next day
And swiftly Miltiades marched
Arriving as the evening fell.
With morning came the Persian host
Their chiefs intent upon the prize
Of sunlit Athens’ shining walls
And morning-gilt Acropolis.
But trumpets sounded on the wind
From many throats a challenge rose
Athena’s army, conquerors
Stood firm and ready on the field.
Dismay fell strong o’er all their foe
And back they turned without a fight
No longer proud the Persian fleet
Defeated, fearing men they fled.
The heroes to their homes returned
And glad were hearts in Hellas then
For on that day was peace restored
Their freedom once again assured.
Copyright ©
fionndruinne
... [
2004-08-30 14:12:22]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by katyqueen35 on
Monday, 30th August 2004 @ 03:00:18 PM AEST
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| Thats an amazing write.good job. |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Monday, 30th August 2004 @ 04:00:21 PM AEST
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Great write, Andrew....Thanks for sharing this..
Jenni |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 30th August 2004 @ 04:00:21 PM AEST
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I love your classic tales. Superb.
wildejohnny. |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Monday, 30th August 2004 @ 07:42:02 PM AEST
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I read it aloud to my son, and it made him breathless and tired to hear it. He really enjoyed it. So did I. Such a classic subject and handled so skillfully. I am one very impressed woman.
Stitch |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by lovingcritters on
Monday, 30th August 2004 @ 08:43:23 PM AEST
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Andrew this is a Historical Masterpiece. I know not history from colleges but from God's word! You explained it so beautifully, and I loved your closing lines...Peace was restored, and their freedom assured.
My how I love your writes.....I come almost everyday.....and I'm so glad to have you writing again!
Warm hugs and Poetic love
consue |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by Tanmaya on
Tuesday, 31st August 2004 @ 06:53:29 AM AEST
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Your writing really amazes me.
I can sincerely say it's brilliant.
'The golden sunlight kindled fire
Of Oceanus’ eastern spray'
'With morning came the Persian host
Their chiefs intent upon the prize
Of sunlit Athens’ shining walls
And morning-gilt Acropolis.'
This is a treat to read.
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by liquidsunshine on
Tuesday, 31st August 2004 @ 08:07:30 PM AEST
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What passion you have, my dear friend.
I wish I could pull this off.
But then you'd write something and I'd have to step back and watch the pro at work.
tee hee
Lots of love and peace be with you,
Chelsea |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by eatfresh22 on
Wednesday, 1st September 2004 @ 02:42:38 PM AEST
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What an awesome story! You did so well at relaying this historical piece. I really enjoyed reading it, and the iambic meter had a nice, easy flow off the page. So... Marathon...I have a new appreciation for the word. Well done, I could tell great thought went into it, as it does into all of your works. I think I may admire you, but just a little. Excellent piece!
Farewell,
~Carrie~ |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 3rd September 2004 @ 02:46:10 AM AEST
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Ah, but to inspire!
You make me want to write more legends, friend! More of lustrous visions such as . . .
"With Miltiades at their head
His scarlet-crested helmet bright."
Excellently portrayed and rhythically eloquent. I fully appreciate the exposition of this, as it takes precious little to know a story, but precious achievement to tell it so well.
One falcon's feather for a quill, you have . . . |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by a_bear on
Friday, 3rd September 2004 @ 03:21:34 PM AEST
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| beautiful, meaningful...all of the 'fuls' ... |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Saturday, 4th September 2004 @ 12:55:13 AM AEST
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Wow, Andrew!
Sometimes I really, really wish I could do more storytelling in my work. I don't think I have a single thing in the "poetry that tells a story" category. Everytime I think of it, though, it just doesn't feel like me.... it is, however, very much you! In the end, I decide to leave the storytelling to those that do it well. Clearly, you are someone that does!
ALWAYS interested,
SNM |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by Wachumiri on
Saturday, 4th September 2004 @ 04:29:32 PM AEST
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Once again, Andrew, once again. You've got an amazing "inner eye". You see so well what you wish to convey, and you do that so masterfully.
Well cousin, take care, and write more.
David |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by Hurretje on
Thursday, 9th September 2004 @ 03:18:40 AM AEST
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Wow, this is a film epos in words! Stunning!
Hugs,
Hur |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Thursday, 9th September 2004 @ 02:11:59 PM AEST
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This is superb.
I've missed your poetry my friend.
And i just had to read this three times just because i missed it. lol.
(Quick fix)
Seriously though. This is another masterpiece.
I love your stories.
I'm afraid i can't offer criticism. Because i can't find anything wrong.
Phil xxx
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by reilt on
Thursday, 9th September 2004 @ 02:17:45 PM AEST
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| A chara, Conas ata tu? This is an outstanding piece of poetry...I am breathless...Totally in awe...Thank you. Le ghra...Reilt* |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by faith_my_eyes on
Saturday, 11th September 2004 @ 09:38:12 PM AEST
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excellent write. I love the imagery... I felt like I was in western civ ;-) God bless Anndra
Em |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on
Tuesday, 21st September 2004 @ 03:34:06 AM AEST
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Wow...excellent description..beautiful rhythm. very lucid wine like style..this is the most beautiful poem which I read today..definitely
you are one of my favorite poets on this site.
I remember I have mentioned that in one of my postings in the forum "the featured poet"
God bless.:-) venkat |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Thursday, 30th September 2004 @ 04:52:52 PM AEST
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| This is a very good poem. You have a great sense of history in your poems. |
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Re: Marathon
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 8th January 2006 @ 06:34:27 PM AEST
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| I have read a selection of your poems tonight and a pleasure it was too.I read this poem twice and only on the second reading did I realise there was no rhyming pattern.I was completely absorbed in the content and the perfect rhythm of the piece,thank you. |
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