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Lost Insight
Contributed by
nazmythian
on
Sunday, 15th August 2004 @ 06:32:51 PM in AEST
Topic:
StoryPoetry
|
There is a slight play of words in here ... I had fun writing this one
The ocean air did I breathe in
As on the deck I sat
While up above the gulls did cry
Below scurried a rat
Within my thoughts, my plunder spent
On wine, women, and song
I lost insight, my mind was wrenched
As everything went wrong
The cries of gulls were my own men
The rat a coral shoal
Our ship had run aground and then
Sea water filled the hull
As hands of Triton pulled us down
Wind exited the sails
A day from shore we all would drown
Beneath the ocean swale
Now lost our treasure had become
Lost under ocean foam
And to these waters we succomb
We're lost in sight of home
Copyright ©
nazmythian
... [
2004-08-15 18:32:51]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Lost Insight
(User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on
Monday, 16th August 2004 @ 01:15:43 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| well painted.. venkat |
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Re: Lost Insight
(User Rating: 1 )
by FleurdeSang on
Sunday, 29th August 2004 @ 02:57:41 PM AEST
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| Very different from the works that I have read, but enchanting all the same! I loved the flow, very well done! I could picture this very clearly. I hate to repeat myself, but for this, I shall repeat till Death takes me. PERFECT! Always and shall forever be in your beguiling words, dearest Naz! You truly are a poet. All my love and respects, as always!! Thank you for sharing this, and for giving me a perfect title for my poem! Aurevoir! |
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Re: Lost Insight
(User Rating: 1 )
by critterhideaway on
Thursday, 9th September 2004 @ 09:50:09 AM AEST
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| Well told story. I like this one |
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