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A Sliver of Hope
Contributed by
KiLin
on
Wednesday, 11th August 2004 @ 12:18:36 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Sick of spinnin in my wonder
so I sit in sin and ponder
I trudge along the trail of death
to clear my head and catch my breath
As I stomp and rant and rave
quickly passing countless graves
I see a man so small and feeble
hanging from a churchs steeple
I can not help but stare at him
and shed a tear so dark and grim
but as the tear rolls down my cheek
he looks at me as though to speak
but all he does is point his finger
at the birds above who linger
Fear consumes his broken face
as they fly with satens grace
All at once the birds attack
and cover him, a sheet of black
These greedy birds had left me none
except the rope from which he hung
The evil truth of death on earth
balanced only by a birth
ironic still, the earth is round
in this circle life is bound
So then no longer, sit and ponder
of sin and pain and evil wonders.
Copyright ©
KiLin
... [
2004-08-11 00:18:36]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: A Sliver of Hope
(User Rating: 1 )
by KiLin on
Wednesday, 11th August 2004 @ 10:06:12 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| Wow!!!!!!!!! Check this out I can comment on my own poetry..........lol. no seriously people come,...................what do you think. |
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Re: A Sliver of Hope
(User Rating: 1 )
by reprobate on
Saturday, 2nd October 2004 @ 05:27:46 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
it needs work...i believe it lacks a focus. i like it, it shows that something is there but what is the question it seems to pose.
thanks for sharing(let me know if i am missing the point or if you decide to upgrade it - i'd like to see it) |
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