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Scrambled Senses
Contributed by
KiLin
on
Tuesday, 10th August 2004 @ 11:37:07 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
What if you, could, taste your smell
or smell your taste, just as well.
Would bad be good or good be bad?
Or could you even tell?
Would scrambled senses drive you mad?
Would rage begin to swell?
Then would you be, eternally,
trapped in a darkened cell?
If a sound were as a touch,
imagine making love.
Intensity, consuming you,
yet harmless as a dove.
Everytime that you are touched
the sound intensifies,
the feelings that your body has,
your soul begins to cry.
Pleasure tears and tears of joy,
your standing on the brink.
Scrambled senses dont deny,
confusing what you think.
I pray one day, that I will know
exactly how this feels.
To rise above and find a love,
that alters what is real.
"But how" I ask, "will I know,
when love is at my door?"
When scrambled senses, takes my hand,
and pulls me from the floor.
Copyright ©
KiLin
... [
2004-08-10 23:37:07]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Scrambled Senses
(User Rating: 1 )
by lovingcritters on
Thursday, 12th August 2004 @ 12:18:29 PM AEST
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a Message)
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You'd better keep your lovely wife KiLn, she has inspired you to write once again!
What a marvelous topic for you to persue...I do believe I'd go insane, or being driven to be deaf, but I'm with you........I'd certainly like to hop that train!!!
Wonderful idea....Scrambled Senses......not anything like I've ever heard before.....Great and interesting write!!! Keep them coming...you and your wife make a wonderful team!
Really enjoyed that one.
Poetic hugs
consue |
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Re: Scrambled Senses
(User Rating: 1 )
by Nomie on
Wednesday, 29th September 2004 @ 08:23:55 AM AEST
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| wow! this was amazing! the way it flowed...wow! Really great write!!! I loved it! :) |
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Re: Scrambled Senses
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Saturday, 3rd June 2006 @ 10:18:00 PM AEST
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| i dont really like these types of writes at all. some of the verses in this i loved, which made this poem more tolerable. those verses werent of the nature of the ones that make me not like poems like this. you had a good ending, but still a cliched rhyme. some of your rhymes are very forced. you had great rhythm in some of this, which also made me sort of like the poem. you obviously have talent, i just dont like some of the things you do with it. but i suppose other people enjoy those sorts of things. |
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