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With Me
Contributed by
Stew
on
Wednesday, 4th August 2004 @ 09:50:07 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
Before I went to bed,
You were with me.
Last night, you were in my dreams.
I dreamt we were together...
Last night, you were in my dreams.
I dreamt you held me close...
Last night, you were in my dreams.
I dreamt you gave me a passionate kiss...
Last night, you were in my dreams.
I dreamt you said I was beautiful...
Last night, you were in my dreams.
I dreamt we made love...
Last night, you were in my dreams.
I dreamt you said, "I love you."
This morning I woke up,
And you were with me.
Copyright ©
Stew
... [
2004-08-04 21:50:07]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: With Me
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Thursday, 5th August 2004 @ 05:01:58 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| Your words are good but I can not find a meter to put a melody to. Maybe that is why it got a low rating (3 stars) I give it 4 stars, because you are expressing your heart and that is always worth the effort in my book |
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Re: With Me
(User Rating: 1 )
by corrupted_minds on
Thursday, 5th August 2004 @ 06:56:16 AM AEST
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a Message)
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This is a very cute poem, i love reading love poems they make me feel like there is still hope for me. Thankz for the good write.
corrupted_minds |
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Re: With Me
(User Rating: 1 )
by zenmind on
Thursday, 5th August 2004 @ 01:34:42 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I like the flow of your words. I like your style, I look forward to reading more of your poetry. I've never been the type to criticize writing or poetry because it doesn't rhyme. To me, rhyming can almost be a hindrance on what I am trying to express. I think the best writing, is the writing that expresses feeling without compromising. If people prefer to do it in a rhyming scheme, that's great. But I, and others, although I cannot speak for you, prefer to just write and express what is true for us without conforming it to any style. The flow is what matters, and this piece flows well.
Be True,
zenmind |
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Re: With Me
(User Rating: 1 )
by Nazmythian on
Saturday, 7th August 2004 @ 05:38:12 AM AEST
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a Message)
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I incorrectly named this in my other comments... my sincere apologies ... a beautiful sentiment. I enjoyed this one.
Naz ~ |
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