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living edge of deciet
Contributed by
angel_facing_judgement
on
Friday, 30th July 2004 @ 05:06:03 AM in AEST
Topic:
AngryPoetry
|
as i sit here in the back of my mind the question arises...do i or dont i?
holding onto the living edge of deciet im slipping to fall..ive cut myself once more
is there any one out there to understand me? to see through the sparkling show
i put on? when i look in the mirror i see storm clouds in my eyes and as the storm
clouds roll thunder threatens as the slick of rain falls..and the tears fall down my cheeks
sitting behind my tricks and selling out of my soul..i digest the dark around me and i
feel heavy, i am yet the cloud that holds the rainas it must be me that falls as only i can fall
a shell forgotten memories long since emptied. bled and caught in something new..for someone new
with no memoeries of their own...its too dark to see and im too stiff to move but still i stumblemy way through....
some how i wish that i could cry just to make something that was never even there
truly see me..ive held on and ive rode out the ride..but i held on to the living edge of deciet just to watch it die..
now im slipping to fall cutting myself for the last time falling to my death
Copyright ©
angel_facing_judgement
... [
2004-07-30 05:06:03]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: living edge of deciet
(User Rating: 1 )
by WinterFawn on
Tuesday, 7th September 2004 @ 09:46:58 AM AEST
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Sometimes it is easier to endure the pain alone and show a smile to eveyone else. This is a very emotional piece. I hope it helps to share these feelings in your writing.
Great poem.
WinterFawn |
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Re: living edge of deciet
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Tuesday, 7th December 2004 @ 09:43:45 AM AEST
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You have a lot of good thoughts and interesting imagery here, but you might concentrate on editing before you post. Check your spelling. Break things up with some punctuation. You have much to say, but long line lengths and lack of breaks will lose your reader.
Stitch |
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