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Within the Hourglass
Contributed by
ShadowDaughter
on
Thursday, 29th July 2004 @ 02:36:05 AM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
I found you in my hourglass
one last grain of too-white sand
to trickle down and die again
birth and life and death,
all sculpted in plastic
when no one was looking
and I smile at you
because it isn't your fault
and who is to say
that I'm not another grain myself?
indeed,
chances are good
that I am
but I'm dreaming dreams
that will never come true
because I know it
and you, you're smiling back at me
because there are so many
more important grains of sand
and bits of plastic
in your life
that you really don't have time
(can't be bothered)
to notice the hourglass surrounding us
and for what you'll never know you're missing,
I'm sorry.
Copyright ©
ShadowDaughter
... [
2004-07-29 02:36:05] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by nexxa on
Thursday, 29th July 2004 @ 02:52:35 AM AEST (User
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They are missing an amazing poet
You just amazing me with your words and I cant for the life of me figure out how anyone could miss the fact that you have major talent I Thank you for your words Nora well done
Nexxa |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by Fwog on
Thursday, 29th July 2004 @ 03:09:21 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Hi ShadowDaughter,
How truly beautiful, and the lines
"and for what you will never know you're missing,
I'm sorry." So deeply moving
A wonderful write,
Thank you
Fwog |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by Tanmaya on
Thursday, 29th July 2004 @ 04:20:21 AM AEST (User
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This is stunning work.
Beautiful! |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by venkat on
Thursday, 29th July 2004 @ 04:57:04 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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excellent.. venkat |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by pixie on
Thursday, 29th July 2004 @ 06:23:40 AM AEST (User
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wow Nora you have such a way with words :) you are a very talented young woman *claps hands*
pixie xx |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by Babigurl on
Thursday, 29th July 2004 @ 06:39:36 AM AEST (User
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Beautiful poem has so much meaning :D keep at it |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by lostinmyself on
Thursday, 29th July 2004 @ 06:56:26 AM AEST (User
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Wow Nora...
This is very sad.
*hugs you*
Anything i can do.
Very heartfelt poem and i'm sorry you feel like this.
Brilliant write.
Lotsa love,
Phil xxx |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by Kie on
Thursday, 29th July 2004 @ 09:21:58 AM AEST (User
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Oh Nora here I sit in tears and first thing in the morning.
You are the whitest, most beautiful & outstanding grain of sand I have ever seen thru your eyes and this hourglass.
If this is about a real person, I hope he opens his eyes and soon for he is missing a treasure and if this is about imagination---it was terribly sad and VERY moving.
Kie : ) |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Thursday, 29th July 2004 @ 09:55:36 AM AEST (User
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Your brilliance shines again, my dear. I pity the person that does not recognize you for they are missing a dazzling gem.
Love,
Rita |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by ladyfawn on
Thursday, 29th July 2004 @ 11:48:29 AM AEST (User
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from your title to last line, nora, this is beautifully written and i love the hourglass comparison; we are all but grains of sand with time left unknown, its what we do with those hours...... hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:- |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by Silent-No-More on
Friday, 30th July 2004 @ 11:21:58 PM AEST (User
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You are simply amazing, Nora. Your voice is so enchanting and wonderful - your words speak directly to the reader's soul. I am so utterly impressed with your work. And this - is no exception! I always read your poems more than once. This one, I read aloud... the words begged to be heard. After having done so - it occured to me that I should read all of your work aloud... in a quiet place, where the words can dance about the room as they seem to want to.
I am convinced that I should never dare to give you advice... you are, dear Nora, so incredibly wise - you probably know better than I.
I'd ask Mick to allow me to drop a 100 stars on this if I thought he would agree-
SNM
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by MoonlitAngel on
Monday, 2nd August 2004 @ 11:36:37 AM AEST (User
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DAMN, Nora!!!!! That is an awesome piece of work. The ending is awesome... gentle and harsh at the same time, somehow. Such subtle bitterness, yet it screamed out at me. I love it. Awesome job!! *hugs*
~ Dee |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by Vitreous_Soul on
Wednesday, 11th August 2004 @ 06:15:38 PM AEST (User
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Before I even clicked on this, something told me it was going to be great. I was wrong; it's far more than just great. Your philosophical mind works quite well in tandem with your immense writing ability, thus producing the radiant work before my eyes.
It reminds me of a Megadeth song called "Time: the Beginning." One of the lines says 'time waits for no one...not even me.' But all comparisons aside, thank you for sharing what has been the highlight of my day so far.
Buried head-first in a pit of quicksand,
-V.S. |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by eatfresh22 on
Wednesday, 18th August 2004 @ 06:14:40 PM AEST (User
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Sensitive, yet clear and direct. I loved the mood and tone you created. Excellent.
~Carrie~ |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by xSlashXPrettyXSkinx on
Sunday, 5th September 2004 @ 04:21:16 PM AEST (User
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Wow... I have no words for how phenominal this poem is Nora. |
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Re: Within the Hourglass
(User Rating: 1 ) by Cynthia on
Wednesday, 22nd September 2004 @ 05:32:36 PM AEST (User
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Nora, you really have a way with words. Wonderfully written my dear friend. Yes, you did mention about my writes. I have to get caught up on reading so much poetry. *HUGS* *S* Cynthia |
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