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Our Perfect End
Contributed by
AsILayDying
on
Tuesday, 27th July 2004 @ 12:54:57 AM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
I''m still listening so please
just keep talking, your tired
but once again I''m forgotten
company. I won''t let you sleep
me away, not tonight, never
but furthermore I''am pushed away
you swear you don''t want it
this way. And I swear I won''t
wake up here tomorrow but
I also never stay fast to my word
I want to slowly fade away from you
and the memories I''ve bled behind
amnesia would be a godsend the
perfect get-a-way to our perfect end
Copyright ©
AsILayDying
... [
2004-07-27 00:54:57]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Our Perfect End
(User Rating: 1 )
by SensitiveSoAbused on
Tuesday, 27th July 2004 @ 01:19:33 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| great style :) |
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Re: Our Perfect End
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 27th July 2004 @ 03:08:13 AM AEST
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a Message)
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your feelings came across really well, well done.
wildejohnny. |
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Re: Our Perfect End
(User Rating: 1 )
by AspenGlow on
Tuesday, 27th July 2004 @ 10:16:01 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Happily ever after....
I liked this, thanks for sharing. |
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Re: Our Perfect End
(User Rating: 1 )
by paper-heart-hero on
Wednesday, 25th August 2004 @ 01:11:14 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| This was done really well, great job. It reads well and the emotion is there. |
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Re: Our Perfect End
(User Rating: 1 )
by AndTheFoolShallBurn on
Wednesday, 22nd September 2004 @ 05:19:39 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| *tear* |
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Re: Our Perfect End
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Monday, 8th November 2004 @ 07:44:25 AM AEST
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The last stanza is my favorite. Isn't that what we all want? When love must end, can't it do it painlessly or just a bit at a time...like the end of a movie when everyone knows everyone will be OK. Nice stuff.
Stitch |
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Re: Our Perfect End
(User Rating: 1 )
by AmyLee4Ever on
Tuesday, 5th July 2005 @ 11:45:38 AM AEST
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a Message)
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The one thing that pushed me away from this was how you ended a statement on the next line while starting a new one at the same time. Overall the poem was great though. Great write...
Jodi |
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