|
Menu
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
The begger
Contributed by
DeathByLove
on
Thursday, 8th July 2004 @ 02:22:05 PM in AEST
Topic:
Suicide
|
I feel stupid, blood is dripping down onto my shirt. I feel it slowly soaking in. My head feels heavy, but I fear to sleep. If I shall sleep, people will beat,rape,and murder my worn self. Death sounds better than anything now. I take a sharp object, and feel it go through my skin.
Copyright ©
DeathByLove
... [
2004-07-08 14:22:05] (Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment. That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: The begger
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Thursday, 8th July 2004 @ 07:15:04 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
hey, ive read your writing and i think its quite, good, its go potential, but i just got afew tips. 1stly, u dont have to rhyme. i think personally, rhyme can take away seriousness from a poem unless done very well. i cant do it, so i rarely try. 2nd of all, arrange ur poems into proper lines, rather than continious writing, it makes the more easy to handle, and enhances the meaning of the words. and otherwise keep goin =) |
|
|
|