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Vortex of My Mind
Contributed by
Dereku
on
Wednesday, 9th June 2004 @ 10:37:38 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
It's quiet...so quiet....lost here in the pit of my mind. I feel...weightless, I'm just floating, yet my body feels as if it weighs a thousand pounds. There is black all around me and all around me is black, I am content with this. I don't mind the dark, do I? I never thought I did. I feel so happy….so content with everything, so at peace.
I think...I think I'm looking up as my body is lying down, but...I can't tell.
Huh? I...I can see my hands, my body...what's this light?
A hole....a giant, white hole...a vortex. It's so pretty....so out of touch with the rest of this world.
I'm comfortable in this place, aren't I? In this black, this...solitude of nothing. No people, just myself. I am curious...what lies inside that vortex? It's so comfortable here...in my world...my mind.
My moment of indecision....I travel through the light.
Copyright ©
Dereku
... [
2004-06-09 22:37:38]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Vortex of My Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 10th June 2004 @ 01:55:30 PM AEST
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a Message)
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This poem is craving structure! It is well spoken and has great thought behind it,but I think it would flow so much nicer in a formatted look. I really like the depths and the sensation you bring alive in your words.
Keep it up! Looking forward to Vortex2
Angel always...godspeed...joni |
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Re: Vortex of My Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by buchi on
Sunday, 4th July 2004 @ 11:04:43 AM AEST
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| This poem just speaks!! |
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Re: Vortex of My Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by MissMandy on
Tuesday, 15th January 2008 @ 06:49:51 PM AEST
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a Message)
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interesting.
and very visual.
keep it up. |
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