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Forgotten light
Contributed by
Hurretje
on
Thursday, 3rd June 2004 @ 03:09:14 AM in AEST
Topic:
selfstruggles
|
In raging darkness
Whirls dark mist
That suffocates silence
Snatches his soul
Shatters his tender mind
Till nothing but screaming black
Deafens his gaping heart
Past the twisting path
Mounting from the sucking chasm
Towering versants make way
Softly sighing they creak
Racked by a silken glow
From the depth
In an unstoppable advance
He stares stupefied
When trembling whispers shout down the roaring
His hands stretched like a baby
In the storm silence preaches
Frozen in a forgotten action
And cheers petrified joy
He closes his eyes in agony
A lonely star ascends
And evaporates in the skyline
Her chant - only a hissing now
No longer torments
The pounding dark
That crushes him
While only then he knows her meaning
Copyright ©
Hurretje
... [
2004-06-03 03:09:14]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Forgotten light
(User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on
Thursday, 3rd June 2004 @ 04:08:45 AM AEST
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a Message)
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" only then he knows her meaning" in silence.
..this write packed with inner emotion and deep feeling is excellent..the state of brooding mind depicted well. It is beautifully done. venkat
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Re: Forgotten light
(User Rating: 1 )
by thumper on
Thursday, 3rd June 2004 @ 06:03:04 AM AEST
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You paint a very vivid picture, indeed! The way you emphasized the help that was coming through was brilliant! Sad ending, though. I enjoyed this immensely! Kudos Hurr!
Thumps ; 0 ) |
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Re: Forgotten light
(User Rating: 1 )
by bernard on
Thursday, 3rd June 2004 @ 10:23:01 AM AEST
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| Another masterpiece. Hur you surprise me again and again with your poetry. This poem tells of an innermost conflict that ends serenly and your command of English is excellent. Keep them coming Cheers bernard. |
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Re: Forgotten light
(User Rating: 1 )
by lovingcritters on
Friday, 4th June 2004 @ 02:07:55 AM AEST
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Bravo again and again.......as you wonder in darkness.......I could feel your pain, I was there with you throughout. Is it because you have to translate into English that your words come out so profoundly. What a marvelous write Hur.
Keep them coming they are great!
Poetic hugs
consue |
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Re: Forgotten light
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 4th June 2004 @ 01:37:32 PM AEST
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excellent work, powerfully written.
wildejohnny. |
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Re: Forgotten light
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Wednesday, 9th June 2004 @ 09:55:55 AM AEST
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You always captivate your reader. Another excellent write.
Stitch |
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Re: Forgotten light
(User Rating: 1 )
by blueheart on
Tuesday, 15th June 2004 @ 09:03:41 PM AEST
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Wow, you are indeed very creative with the imagery and words you use.
Magnificent poem. |
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Re: Forgotten light
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Wednesday, 23rd June 2004 @ 03:32:49 PM AEST
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beautifully written, love your style and choice of words here:) hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:- |
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Re: Forgotten light
(User Rating: 1 )
by eatfresh22 on
Wednesday, 13th October 2004 @ 04:24:25 PM AEST
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a Message)
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The title alone was great, and the poem was indeed captivating. Very strong and worth the read. Nice work.
~Carrie~ |
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