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Can't Stay Here
Contributed by
Silent-No-More
on
Friday, 28th May 2004 @ 10:46:48 PM in AEST
Topic:
selfstruggles
|
Yesterday is on my front step
Rapping on the door
Wanting me to step outside
Yet I remain unsure
If I could see Tomorrow now
I’d move on without doubt
But the future is lost to me
For I have shut it out
In the present tense I linger
Though I’m unhappy here
Moving forward, going back
Each one of these I fear
Yesterday keeps on knocking
Tomorrow is a tease
They keep calling, tugging at me
Increasing by degrees
I am hopelessly undecided
Listening to their call
Dancing on an invisible line
Wanting so to fall
Tomorrow cries from the dark
Offering only the unknown
Yesterday whispers sweetly to me
Telling me how I’ve grown
Their voices tumble together
Making it so unclear
I do not know to which I’ll go
But I know I can’t stay here
Copyright ©
Silent-No-More
... [
2004-05-28 22:46:48]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Can't Stay Here
(User Rating: 1 )
by bttrflynajar on
Friday, 28th May 2004 @ 11:03:11 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| this is a really good poem, i enjoyed reading it. it reminds me of the way i felt when i was going through some major changes of my own, it feels like you stuck, dont wanna move back, dont wanna move foward!~BttRFlY |
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Re: Can't Stay Here
(User Rating: 1 )
by UnfallenTears on
Friday, 28th May 2004 @ 11:06:11 PM AEST
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this is one of the best one's I've read so far. I like the symbolism. Really great, don't stop writing.
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Re: Can't Stay Here
(User Rating: 1 )
by Sylvias on
Friday, 28th May 2004 @ 11:16:07 PM AEST
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| I like it. It has a good rhythm to it. |
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Re: Can't Stay Here
(User Rating: 1 )
by blueheart on
Friday, 28th May 2004 @ 11:18:55 PM AEST
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| Wow, I'm so glad I read this, thanks for sharing. |
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Re: Can't Stay Here
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Saturday, 29th May 2004 @ 12:31:34 AM AEST
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this is great, let go of past and future and just breathe:) hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:- |
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Re: Can't Stay Here
(User Rating: 1 )
by Whisper on
Saturday, 29th May 2004 @ 12:54:57 AM AEST
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Nice write my heart knows how you feel.
Whisper |
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Re: Can't Stay Here
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vitreous_Soul on
Saturday, 29th May 2004 @ 06:33:38 AM AEST
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Fascinating poem. I enjoyed the way you addressed Tomorrow and Yesterday as not only periods in time, but as entities unto themselves. Very creative, you have quite a vivid imagination.
"In the present tense I linger
Though I’m unhappy here
Moving forward, going back
Each one of these I fear"
That particular stanza really spoke to me. Thank you for sharing this sterling effort.
Pummelled by cast stones,
-V.S. |
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Re: Can't Stay Here
(User Rating: 1 )
by holderofthestone on
Saturday, 29th May 2004 @ 02:27:14 PM AEST
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| remember the more we fall the farther we get from the brink! great poem here keep writing ill keep reading! |
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Re: Can't Stay Here
(User Rating: 1 )
by brigitte7735 on
Saturday, 29th May 2004 @ 10:14:38 PM AEST
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i really really love your poems, but this one is so classy
"But i know i cant stay here"
that is so glorious
Vanessa |
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Re: Can't Stay Here
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 5th May 2006 @ 04:18:38 AM AEST
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I like how you dealt with the retrospection in this one...at least as for as not letting yesterday in and knowing you can't stay. I can relate to not being sure what one wants to do and you give a glimmer of hope in the end to move on...to see what tomorrow will bring.
Awesome poem, Snemmers. :-)
Tim |
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