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What ill News Sets Upon the Sweet
Contributed by
fldadn1
on
Friday, 28th May 2004 @ 04:20:17 PM in AEST
Topic:
Grief
|
A smile that looks like a frown
I see it is, this smile is upside down
What ill news sets upon the sweet?
Was it the special that swept you from your feet
Why must a day lay upon you
one that is as dark as this
Why must one be fed
the opposite of their dearest wish
And now you see alone
in ever y corner you find
but which way did the world leave you
ahead or behind?
Copyright ©
fldadn1
... [
2004-05-28 16:20:17]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: What ill News Sets Upon the Sweet
(User Rating: 1 )
by CeruleanScreams on
Friday, 28th May 2004 @ 05:54:58 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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| Good write, especially the part about smiles upside-down. |
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Re: What ill News Sets Upon the Sweet
(User Rating: 1 )
by Cole on
Monday, 21st June 2004 @ 07:17:59 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
This is pretty good. I'm glad to finally stumble across a poem that rhymes, but it doesn't sound so forced. The rhymes are well-used in this poem. I really enjoyed reading it. Amanda is lucky.
-Nichole-
P.S. - If you could read and review one of my poems in return for me having done the same, it'd be very much appreciated. |
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Re: What ill News Sets Upon the Sweet
(User Rating: 1 )
by ammalu on
Wednesday, 23rd June 2004 @ 03:35:55 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| concern shown is ' touching' but there is ambiguity in the theme - god effort - keep writing. |
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