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My Biggest Mistake .....ABORTION

Contributed by MIZZ_SIMMONS on Wednesday, 26th May 2004 @ 03:10:42 PM in AEST
Topic: Grief



My body shakes as I walk
through the door
A white cold room
with baby foot prints on the floor
Sitting in the waiting room
my mind begins to wonder
The nurse calls out my name
I hear this roar of thunder
She takes down my information
questions if I'm sure
Silance excapes my mouth
thinking of the pain i will indure
The nurse explains the procedure
and how long it will take
Knowing my child wont be there
at the time of my awake
The tears begin to flow
this is something I cannot do
Stoping the life of a child
so innocent and new
Still with mother at my side
I go along with this sin
Only God knows of
the pain I feel within
My breathing gets heavy
body starts to shake
Doctor says "2 minutes
is all the abortion will take"
I lay back in the bed
and the anithesia puts me in a zone
Heart crushed because
I'm killing my very own
I feel my self squirmming
not wanting to go on
Next thing I knew it
was to late my babies gone
As I awake I feel the
nurse place me in a chair
Regreting whea I've done
it was just so unfair
Sitting in the recovery room
I begin to clench my seat
Feeling nothing but emptyness
from my head down to my feet
I touch my belly
hoping to feel "IT" move
My mother noticed my search
and just began to sooth
I could hear my child
screaming echoing in my head
Letting me hear every tear
my baby had just shed
If only I would've answered NO
when the nurse had asked me
My child would be here
smiling as I bounce her on my knee
I wish I could just hold you
so tightly in my arms
Shower you with kisses
and admire your precious baby charms
Missing out on all the exciting moments
like when you begin to walk
hating the fact that I'll never be able
to hear you when you talk
I will never forget the pain that I felt
when I realized you were taken away
It stays on my mind every
second, minute and hour of every day


May you be free with God and watch over me
Mommey loves you Anjenay I'm so sorry.




Copyright © MIZZ_SIMMONS ... [ 2004-05-26 15:10:42]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: My Biggest Mistake .....ABORTION (User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on Wednesday, 26th May 2004 @ 03:20:07 PM AEST
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God forgives
this is why he sent his son
to die upon a scornful tree
it grants such hope to us.
I'm glad that you have shared with us
how valuable life is
and I hope you get a second chance
to have a child again.


Re: My Biggest Mistake .....ABORTION (User Rating: 1 )
by Ilhar on Wednesday, 26th May 2004 @ 03:50:03 PM AEST
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You have already been forgiven...and you were a victim of what they don't tell you...that you will mourn your lost child...it is only natural...my heart goes out to you

Shari


Re: My Biggest Mistake .....ABORTION (User Rating: 1 )
by AliB on Wednesday, 26th May 2004 @ 04:23:55 PM AEST
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OMG. I don't know what to say. Brilliant words for such a sad tale, I was in your situation 15 years ago, the day before I was to go into hospital though I broke down and cancelled the appointment. I am a strong person and only dreamt of being a mother when I was still at school. I have never regretted not going through with it although now he's really testing me, but you must have had your reasons and I'm sure that when the time is right for you you'll be a fantastic mummy. Good luck to you and don't bottle up your feelings, talk about it, this is a good start. Best wishes,

Ali xx


Re: My Biggest Mistake .....ABORTION (User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on Wednesday, 26th May 2004 @ 06:47:15 PM AEST
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brought me to tears this poem did. Im sure you have been forgiven sorry for your pain
Michelle


Re: My Biggest Mistake .....ABORTION (User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on Thursday, 27th May 2004 @ 12:20:33 AM AEST
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this was very moving. im sorry for what youve been through.


Re: My Biggest Mistake .....ABORTION (User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on Thursday, 27th May 2004 @ 09:28:02 AM AEST
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This is a very touching and moving poem, you have been incredibley brave to come on here and share it with us all, I can't for one moment imagine the pain you must have been & are still going through.

takecare,
Pixie xx


Re: My Biggest Mistake .....ABORTION (User Rating: 1 )
by jaeann on Thursday, 27th May 2004 @ 02:53:45 PM AEST
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you should be proud of yourself......you have the courage to express great loss with beautiful words.......she knows you love her......trust in her spirit to come be with you again......


Re: My Biggest Mistake .....ABORTION (User Rating: 1 )
by Dawny on Saturday, 29th May 2004 @ 05:29:52 AM AEST
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This is a very moving and emotional poem which brought tears to my eyes. I wish you all the love in the world, and remember that you're not alone.

Love Dawny x




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