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In this corner...
Contributed by
reprobate
on
Sunday, 23rd May 2004 @ 07:30:13 PM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
Can you hear it
just a silent interruption
'midst the bustle of the angry world
The sound of lonely
I feel you passing
With each and every breath
Your hand slips from mine
Day by day, inch by inch, finger by finger
As silent as the Reaper
pawing, scratching, in the background
Whispering that mournful low
Deafening within the echoes of teardrops
I know you're fading
From all the plans and dreams
This heart now knows what the eyes see
Step by step, tear by tear, you are gone
Through each dimming day
the alone song wails
The falling shadows remind
One heart only, beats here
I want nothing from this world any more
But the universe wants everything from me
With nothing left to give, still it demands
Drop by drop, tick by tock, Oh please, no more
Copyright ©
reprobate
... [
2004-05-23 19:30:13]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: In this corner...
(User Rating: 1 )
by TheSchroedmeister on
Sunday, 23rd May 2004 @ 07:34:23 PM AEST
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a Message)
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If loneliness made a sound, what would it be? The line "The sound of lonely" bade me to think this. The first line of the last stanza was also very powerful;
"I want nothing from this world any more"
Both serve to tie the piece together into a dark and emotional write, and one that was quite a thrill to read as well. |
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Re: In this corner...
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Sunday, 23rd May 2004 @ 08:21:25 PM AEST
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wow, this poem blew me away, i feel like this too, were you looking over my shoulder into my soul? lol! ......this is sooo excellent, an exquisite write, thanks so much for sharing:) hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:- |
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Re: In this corner...
(User Rating: 1 )
by Colleen on
Sunday, 23rd May 2004 @ 08:31:28 PM AEST
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| That was really deep and amazing work. Way to capture an emotion and stick with it! |
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Re: In this corner...
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 23rd May 2004 @ 10:07:59 PM AEST
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Mike, just keep flowing and shifting until life fits again. It will one day. Until then, just don't give up the fight.
Rita |
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Re: In this corner...
(User Rating: 1 )
by Hurretje on
Monday, 24th May 2004 @ 01:52:31 AM AEST
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Deeply emotional and very touching and full of a died craving... Very good poem...
Greetz,
Hur |
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Re: In this corner...
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Wednesday, 26th May 2004 @ 03:49:49 PM AEST
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This poem is a great discription of loneliness.
May friends come and send the clouds of loneliness away. |
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