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Chance of Pain

Contributed by reprobate on Saturday, 22nd May 2004 @ 04:19:30 PM in AEST
Topic: SadPoetry



A horrific crack resounds and reverberates
The flash preceeding was equally impressive
Sheets of wet coat all, a silver transparent sheen
'Not a fit night' you recall as soaked shoulders hunch

Still, it fits the mood within your thoughts
Both black as the night that now hosts them
The day started fair enough as was your spirit
That faded also as did the sun of then

Innocuous words and deeds, a personal storm
Never for a moment, not even a hint
Now here they are, the cold wet and the black empty
Hanging from you like old thrift shop clothes

What was it that she said; mindless steps in puddles
Don't need to find out when I've made up my mind
Shock, dumfounded blank; FLASH,BOOM, futile wipe
Now it's soaking in, maybe carried by the rain

So this is how it's done these days
Honorless, heartless, cold and cruel
Just open and dump
Like an unexpected storm




Copyright © reprobate ... [ 2004-05-22 16:19:30]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Chance of Pain (User Rating: 1 )
by holderofthestone on Saturday, 22nd May 2004 @ 04:30:30 PM AEST
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hmm very deep. i know the feeling


Re: Chance of Pain (User Rating: 1 )
by JennyFruFru on Saturday, 22nd May 2004 @ 05:10:51 PM AEST
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its like being so upset but no one knows but you ... cuz you carry it all inside... and your so upset you cant even cry... dont know if thats what you were getting at but its how i interpreted your words... and the thoughts that came to my head as i read it...


Re: Chance of Pain (User Rating: 1 )
by liquidsunshine on Saturday, 22nd May 2004 @ 05:43:42 PM AEST
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A teacher of mine recently smashed my dreams. It was the first class of my day, my spirits were high, soaring in fact, and I told her I wanted to be a music teacher. Her response? "Heaven help you...rather... heaven help those students." That day it began to rain. I think of rain as a way for me to relieve myself of pain... kind of therapeutic, I guess. It was just what I needed, but I hate the fact that I needed it. This poem really hits home for that situation. Thanks for posting. Its a vivid write with brilliant flow.
Bravo! Encore!
Love,
Chelsea


Re: Chance of Pain (User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on Saturday, 22nd May 2004 @ 08:20:51 PM AEST
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wow...... hugs n' love nessa

@->>->:-


Re: Chance of Pain (User Rating: 1 )
by reilt on Sunday, 23rd May 2004 @ 12:41:10 PM AEST
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wonderfully deep. such a powerful write. this really moves me. thank you




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