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Ode to the Desperate Girl
Contributed by
Silent-No-More
on
Tuesday, 18th May 2004 @ 03:01:09 PM in AEST
Topic:
dedicatedpoems
|
Scream
Wail
And wallow in it
If you must
Pathetic
Hopeless
Succumbing
To your lust
But - Oh!
You must learn
Not to leave
Pieces
Of yourself
On his sleeve
Scream
Wail
And rage wide open
If you dare
Pathetic
Hopeless
Yielding
To his care
But - Oh!
You have to
Stop giving so
Pieces
Of your soul
You’re letting go.
Copyright ©
Silent-No-More
... [
2004-05-18 15:01:09]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Ode to the Desperate Girl
(User Rating: 1 )
by Another_Dimension on
Tuesday, 18th May 2004 @ 03:16:47 PM AEST
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| I think i know what you're trying to say, quite powerful, i give it a 3/5 |
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Re: Ode to the Desperate Girl
(User Rating: 1 )
by Remy on
Tuesday, 18th May 2004 @ 03:54:53 PM AEST
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i wonder sometimes if a friend of mine feels this, because many a time the thoughts in your write seem to be the lasting impression she leaves... great write, made me think of a lot... ;0)
~Remy~ |
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Re: Ode to the Desperate Girl
(User Rating: 1 )
by carmen_queasy on
Thursday, 20th May 2004 @ 04:46:11 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| I like this poem, it has a sort of bitter sarcastic tone to it which seeps behind the bigger picture. It's pretty cool. |
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Re: Ode to the Desperate Girl
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Sunday, 23rd May 2004 @ 09:42:47 PM AEST
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ooooooo wonderfully moving....... hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:- |
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Re: Ode to the Desperate Girl
(User Rating: 1 )
by n2dep2care on
Saturday, 15th January 2005 @ 08:54:07 AM AEST
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Very excellent and slaking advice. Well written and worded. Great piece.
Laurie |
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Re: Ode to the Desperate Girl
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 25th February 2005 @ 12:59:56 AM AEST
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Coulnd't do it... had to say it... beautiful! Its inspiring, expressive and moving. Very nicely done.
Take Care
-Becca
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Re: Ode to the Desperate Girl
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 30th April 2006 @ 01:48:58 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Aw, Snem, Timmy loves it....the poem that is.....not what you were probably feeling. Seeing as how it can work for both genders, yeah, been there, falling too fast, falling too hard, and finally falling out of it....
"Pieces
Of your soul
You’re letting go.
Yeah, know what you mean.
Very well put.
Thank you,
Timmy
:-)
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Re: Ode to the Desperate Girl
(User Rating: 1 )
by ButchHoward on
Monday, 8th May 2006 @ 12:20:11 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Your capacity to write and convey genuine feelings with such an economy of words is just amazing. Every word, every line and every stanza stands on its own -a testament to honest self examination. Brilliant!
Butch |
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