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Unspoken
Contributed by
DirtyFool
on
Thursday, 13th May 2004 @ 11:01:59 AM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
UNSPOKEN
I've been dying tell you,
How I feel,
I've been trying to tell you,
What's the deal,
But when I try and talk,
Nothing comes out,
My heart just pounds,
Everytime I look at you,
I'm crying out,
I need to say these words,
That even though little,
They mean so much,
I'm dying to feel your touch,
I'm losing my mind,
This love is unkind,
In my head,
I know it will not happen,
But my heart wont let you go,
Before it's to late,
You must know,
That every day I think of you,
Every moment I need you,
And always and forever,
I will love you,
But it's breaking my heart,
And tearing me apart,
That you don't know I care
Copyright ©
DirtyFool
... [
2004-05-13 11:01:59]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Unspoken
(User Rating: 1 )
by SweetRhythm on
Thursday, 13th May 2004 @ 11:07:01 AM AEST
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a Message)
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whoa that was moving, uv got talent & your all loved up, who ever they are they really have captured your heart to a whole other level, thats was powerful & very nicely recited, i enjoyed it a lot, thanks for sharing the beauty of love!
FlawlessDumy |
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Re: Unspoken
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 13th May 2004 @ 05:25:25 PM AEST
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Nothing like unrequieted love to bring out a good poem.
Well written, although I feel pedantic enough to point out this line;
"That even though little,
They mean so much,"
I would have changed that to
"To you may mean little
But to me mean so much"
Just a thought. Your poem is fine, in my opinion wihtout it, however.
Well done. And welcome to YPDC. |
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