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Sweet Surrender
Contributed by
OMEGA_
on
Saturday, 8th May 2004 @ 11:30:34 AM in AEST
Topic:
selfstruggles
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Hard stressed day
Firing weather
Cloudy sky mixed with gray
Rush hour and the usual traffic jam
People are hurrying to their houses
The wheel of routine drives them slam
LoOk!! what a weird guy
Guess what makes him interesting in walking alone,
Enjoying this way?
Careless of all the mess around him
Has nothing to scream about or any attention to pay
That was I...
Blocking my ears with headphones
Walking blindly through the emotion of my played song
Through a tunnel of deep beating echoes
Optimizing to find a place where I belong
I kept walking
Hours were passing by
Yes...that is real believe me I'm not joking
My head was aching and dizzying
Fainted...maybe I was,
Flashes of animated life shots are fading to pause
Pressure over my eyelashes pushing it to close
Weakness contained all of my body
My legs struggle for one more step
And I still don't want stop
Torturing my self as much as I can
I have no reasons for what I'm doing
Maybe I've done a sin before
And my wakens conscience refuses to ignore
I don't know what I'm looking for
I feel so tired and I can't find a cure
Finally I can't feel anything at all
My bones, my legs, my body and my face
Through the nowhere I'm still walking where it might be my only place
Oh, it's the same old vision
Me alone in a dark tight room
Fresh air all over my ineffective mind
Flirting me tenderly, washing away my gloom
Low sneaking blue light
Surrounding my fear
While the old whispered words repeat in my ear
Toning that rhythm of that magical song
Which from my heart beats I always used to hear
I'm swinging so energetic, I'm on the peak of my joy
I want laugh, I want cry, I want know what I'm trying to destroy?
I don't know what kind of tears are they
But finally I stopped walking cause I lost the way
Rapidly I fall down on earth
And I have no explain
For the happiness I felt while I'm enjoying my pain...
Now I peacefully lying down
Where I lost all of my defenders
And the whisper of those deep-beating echoes is my only lasting reminder,
Of this super journey,
Through my sentimental
Which I call it
"The Sweet Surrender"
Copyright ©
OMEGA_
... [
2004-05-08 11:30:34]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Sweet Surrender
(User Rating: 1 )
by lil_angel on
Saturday, 8th May 2004 @ 11:51:16 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| Great write! wonderful job! maybe it fits in life poetry?? Wonderfully done! |
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Re: Sweet Surrender
(User Rating: 1 )
by xSlashXPrettyXSkinx on
Saturday, 8th May 2004 @ 12:21:42 PM AEST
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a Message)
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This is awesome OMEGA. I'm really glad you're sharing this with us. Now after reading it, a suitable topic might be, well the one that closely fits I suppose would be "Having a bad day" or maybe "Self Struggle". Great write.
Lindsey |
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Re: Sweet Surrender
(User Rating: 1 )
by AnGeL_M on
Sunday, 9th May 2004 @ 05:48:36 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Nicely Written Omega !!!!!!!!! Very Enjoyable Read !!!!! Loved It :-)
*******LoVe**AnGeL********
****************************** |
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Re: Sweet Surrender
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Thursday, 13th May 2004 @ 04:00:44 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Very interesting journey.
luv, huggs,
emy |
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Re: Sweet Surrender
(User Rating: 1 )
by arden on
Friday, 14th May 2004 @ 02:18:28 PM AEST
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wow, this was amazing! so well written. this is pure greatness. i loved it. well done keep up the awesome work
Arden |
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Re: Sweet Surrender
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Tuesday, 25th May 2004 @ 02:04:08 PM AEST
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| Good poem, it seems like your journey ended on a positive note. |
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Re: Sweet Surrender
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Wednesday, 7th July 2004 @ 06:44:46 PM AEST
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a Message)
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wonderfully woven words, an excellent write:) hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:- |
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Re: Sweet Surrender
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Wednesday, 7th July 2004 @ 08:42:18 PM AEST
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Well now handsome,
I luv it jus fine the way it is. Please don't change a thing.
This one is a masterpeice as I think we can all relate many times over in our lives.
luv, huggs, joy,
emy |
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Re: Sweet Surrender
(User Rating: 1 )
by Broken_Skin on
Sunday, 11th July 2004 @ 05:42:57 AM AEST
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This confused me..
think i missed something :(
Probs cos lounge act by nirvana was playing in the background lol
Still good
BS x
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Re: Sweet Surrender
(User Rating: 1 )
by Avarice_Riot on
Wednesday, 14th July 2004 @ 01:06:48 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Very enjoyable read, I like the style and flow of words here. The scene is effortless to visualise as well. Great write. |
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Re: Sweet Surrender
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 14th July 2004 @ 04:11:25 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Really expressive and worth another read.
Well done. You have a clear voice.
Use it wisely. |
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