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I wish I could forget

Contributed by jishes_4_ever on Tuesday, 4th May 2004 @ 10:01:28 PM in AEST
Topic: LostLove

You talk to me as if what your saying won't hurt
But it does
It hurts more then you could ever know
I feel so much pain, I can not bare to feel this way anymore.
I wish I could forget you
I wish I could just swipe you from my memories
But life is not that simple, and love is not that simple.
I fell for you that is true, but I did not know that you would break my heart.
You said that we would always be together no matter what
And I believed you because I loved you
Did you mean it when you said you loved me?
Or was it all just lie
I have so many questions that you could never answer
Why did you have to break my heart?
I loved you and you just left me like I was nothing
I can not stand the pain I am feeling
You broke my heart in two
If only you could feel my pain, then you would know how much it hurts

Copyright © jishes_4_ever ... [ 2004-05-04 22:01:28]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: I wish I could forget (User Rating: 0 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 4th May 2004 @ 10:56:06 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

You got a good start, jishes, now you just have work on the rythm. As you write, let the phrases flow. If you feel the smoothness, and balance, you've got a poem.
The way I see it, the only thing needing attention with your work is the flow. A little polish and it'll make you happy. If you're happy with it, it'll be easier to make others see what it is trying to accomplish.
a lot of people share your feelings that you've expressed but they've chosen not to say them. Be their mouth and let the feelings flow.
Go for it!

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