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Resonance Au Revoir
Contributed by
EternitysLyre
on
Saturday, 1st May 2004 @ 06:58:53 AM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
~"I'm not afraid of falling. I'm afraid--
There's no one willing to catch me."
When starlight steals away the blue
And skylines adorn velvet hues
In moonlit ripples shimmer true
Blinded eyes redeem virtue
The lamppost lingers in the cold
Whisp’ry touches hearts of gold
And half a world in slumber’s hold
(When everything’s all bought and sold)
Through sleepless strolls of midnight rain
Memories by hunger maimed
Vibrant streets by moonlight plain
The last escape by silence slain
The sunlight streams secluded gleams
And pierces pretense bright
In starlit beams of broken dreams--
(--When everything's just as it seems--)
It hurts to see the light.
Copyright ©
EternitysLyre
... [
2004-05-01 06:58:53]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Resonance Au Revoir
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vitreous_Soul on
Saturday, 1st May 2004 @ 07:08:59 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Thus I stand without speech...
This poem just ripped my heart out--delicately written, with that certain hint of melancholia to drive home the emotion. This just clicked on all levels...technically sound, fluid, and phrased in such a way that only you can deliver.
I think you may just be my favourite poet on all of YPDC. And with good reason.
Truly,
-V.S. |
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Re: Resonance Au Revoir
(User Rating: 1 )
by Kie on
Saturday, 1st May 2004 @ 05:58:03 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Initially I was drawn in by the title. When I read this--~"I'm not afraid of falling. I'm afraid--
There's no one willing to catch me."
Well it really touched my heart deeply.
Your poem was beautiful, sad, filled with emotion and I am in awe and yet sad upon reading it.
It hit me hard.
Kie |
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Re: Resonance Au Revoir
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 3rd May 2004 @ 04:37:18 AM AEST
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I like the way you interject the last line, to make it sound as if (to me at least) its some kind of analog transmission, outwith the remit, initially, but then within it finally. I may use this more often.
I also like the way it resonated. I wrote something along the same lines not that long ago, but with a distinct lack of polish compared to this.
I like it so. |
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Re: Resonance Au Revoir
(User Rating: 1 )
by STRaNGe_LiNDSeY on
Wednesday, 5th May 2004 @ 02:44:38 PM AEST
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I have to say first, the title intriqued me... Then the quote "I'm not afraid of falling. I'm afraid--
There's no one willing to catch me." Was screaming READ ME READ ME! I too fear this so I was right there with you from the start. The poem was absultely beautiful and honest and true and I loved every single word of it. But what made it so much more for me was that last little line... tha last little "It hurts to see the light". Made it encompass me completely. I really loved this poem. I might have to agree with Vitreous_Soul, you may just be on of the best and my person favorite from the site and anywhere for that matter. Wow, you have really outdone it, Eternitys...
Lindsey |
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Re: Resonance Au Revoir
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Friday, 14th May 2004 @ 08:01:01 PM AEST
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Excellent! I love the vibrancy of language you use, and the wistfulness of the piece. Also the quote at the beginning. This is a poem of singular beauty. Well done!
Andrew |
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