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Reflection On Regret

Contributed by sweet-poison on Thursday, 29th April 2004 @ 06:31:51 PM in AEST
Topic: EmotionalPoetry



I lay awake most nights,
Thinking about what could have been,
If things would have been any different,
If half my mistakes,
I didn't make.

The littlest things,
That make me wonder,
Giving the bus driver the wrong change,
Buying the wrong sized clothes,
What would I be like,
If I didn't make mistakes?

I see you, My best friend, Rachel,
Aged 10 and a half,
Remember when we argued?
I said we shouldn't be best friends?
Our parents laughed,
Said it would pass, It never did,
I see you everyday,
But still remember you as a child,
The fun we had,
You're different now, aged 16,
I don't recognise you,
What would it of been like,
If we never argued?

Aged 16, Would we still be sisters?
Would we still joke and tease?
Would you be that 10-year-old,
That I loved so dearly?
I wish we'd never argued,
I would like to know you again,
Compare the you aged 10, to now,
To see if what I said,
Was wrong, A mistake.

And you, My first love,
I don't even know what I did wrong,
I don't actually know why you left,
I remember when we argued,
When you threatened to leave,
Whilst you listened to me cry,
I was young and naive,
I believed you'd come back,
So I didn't fight for you,
Was that my mistake?
Was that my fault within our relationship?

Back then, When I was 15,
If I had of fought for you,
If I held onto you,
Would we still be together now?
Would our relationship of progressed?
Perhaps turned into real love?
I still wonder about you,
Dream about what it would have been like,
If you never left, If you were here,
I wonder if you love someone else now.

Then there's you, My parents,
When I was young you were constantly arguing,
I only ever saw my father at weekends,
And you, mother, you spent your time crying,
Then you'd get back together,
But the arguments never stopped,
You blamed me for your marriage,
Neither of you really wanted it,
You said it was for my benefit,
If I was better behaved as a child,
Would you both be happy? Together?

Remember when I was 6,
Christmas Eve, When you came home,
I hadn't seen you for months, Dad,
Remember? I didn't recognise you,
To me, You were just a strange man in black,
Stood in the hall, I cried,
Is it always going to be like that?
Will I always be without you for countless months?
Is it me? Do you avoid me?
I would like to have you back,
To know you properly.

All these doubts, Are they my mistakes?
Are they mine to take the blame for?
Are these sleepless nights worthwhile?
If by erasing these memories I could forget,
If by forgetting I could overcome the regrets,
I would accept my mistakes.




Copyright © sweet-poison ... [ 2004-04-29 18:31:51]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Reflection On Regret (User Rating: 1 )
by Saitou-sama on Thursday, 29th April 2004 @ 06:36:52 PM AEST
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Wow. This was really emotion and well written. ::hugs:: It's not your fault. Really, it's not. You can't blame yourself these things. You can only blame yourself for your actions, not those of your parents or boyfriend. They made their decisions and they'll regret it someday.


Re: Reflection On Regret (User Rating: 1 )
by Doozmami on Thursday, 29th April 2004 @ 06:55:31 PM AEST
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dats a rele good poem.. i love it, so much meanin in it.. something like wat i felt a lil while ago, gets me thinkin again.. but styll nice...

-Doozmami.. [ scanin thru poems n commented ]


Re: Reflection On Regret (User Rating: 1 )
by Loyalist on Monday, 3rd May 2004 @ 06:37:47 AM AEST
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Your style of writing is very interesting to me.
I cannot understand why there aren't more comments on your work.
It is very good.
Very insightful.
Very introspective.
Keep it coming, I will read.


Re: Reflection On Regret (User Rating: 1 )
by whisper-of-night on Monday, 17th May 2004 @ 09:53:55 PM AEST
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................................................................(*sigh*).........................................you know........everybody would make mistakes or leave regrets now and then,(such as I have tons of my own) and most of the times we only realiaze it after it is too late, and when it is too late, the more you think about it, the more it will get to you, drive we crazy and insaint, that is why now when I do things, I would always try my best and see if I can make things as perfect as it can be, we can't change the past, then at least we should try to change the present, and the future............ thanks Kay, your poem really made me thinks.................




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