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Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
Contributed by
hurretje
on
Tuesday, 27th April 2004 @ 05:09:26 AM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
I am in a trance
But somehow I'm not
Because when I see you
I know
You despise me
Spit me out
No, it is not even that
I don't exist at all
For I'm no part of your thoughts
That are filled
With sunshine
And new clothes
With blue skies
And that delicious new flagrance
With pink blossoms
And that great new movie
But not with me
But still
You laugh at me
Exuberant
When no one watches
Stealthy
In a faceless crowd
And you beam
While the rest fades
To achromatic stripes
You suck all energy
Out of me
Like a vampire
I am
...an empty cover...
I reach for your red mouth
...but I can't get advance...
My arms stretched
For my screaming clock radio
Copyright ©
hurretje
... [
2004-04-27 05:09:26]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on
Tuesday, 27th April 2004 @ 05:34:38 AM AEST
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| well done. venkat |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by ThePumpkinKing on
Tuesday, 27th April 2004 @ 06:37:20 AM AEST
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| hm, this was interesting...i like it! =P good job |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by alecfernadez on
Tuesday, 27th April 2004 @ 07:23:52 AM AEST
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I was drawn by the title which is a line from a really good song by Eurythmics (later covered by Marilyn Manson)
Anyway great write and not what I expected, kinda like an angsty love poem which is really cool!
***Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree?
Travel the world and the seven seas
Everybody's looking for something
Some of them want to use you
Some of them want to get used by you
Some of them want to abuse you
Some of them want to be abused*** by Eurythmics |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by Menelaus on
Tuesday, 27th April 2004 @ 07:54:03 AM AEST
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Yet they say,
"Dreaming is the real power". |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by JennyFruFru on
Tuesday, 27th April 2004 @ 08:05:39 AM AEST
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| what a twist at the end...... wonderful write :) |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by Kie on
Tuesday, 27th April 2004 @ 08:06:19 AM AEST
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"You suck all energy
Out of me
Like a vampire
I am"
Very powerful. So often I feel like this at work. The demands just suck the life force right out of me. For those 8 + hours I feel like an old woman trapped in a young womans body.
Adored this poem. Very much so.
Kie
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by Black13 on
Tuesday, 27th April 2004 @ 11:36:44 AM AEST
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I deeply enjoyed this one.
Very well written.
Good job. |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by bernard on
Tuesday, 27th April 2004 @ 11:56:08 AM AEST
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| The pre awakening time is just right for dreaming. Sometimes our dreams are just wishful others it is of a precognitive view of things. Your poem is saying just that I like the idea and by the way my best dreams come just before awakeing, Cheers bernard. |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by Cynthia on
Thursday, 29th April 2004 @ 09:04:45 AM AEST
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| Isn't it strange how our dreams make us feel? This was excellent. I loved every word of it. Great job. *S* Cynthia |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Sunday, 2nd May 2004 @ 03:24:26 AM AEST
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wonderfully written, very enjoyable to read:) hugs n' love nessa
@->>->- |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by arden on
Sunday, 2nd May 2004 @ 03:08:58 PM AEST
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whoa i liked this alot.
very well written.
an amazing write.
youve got alot of talent.
Arden |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 3rd May 2004 @ 09:33:26 AM AEST
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great poem loved the ending that unexpected twist "for my screaming clock radio" i was expecting something like "for my screaming to get louder" or something along those lines
brilliant.
wildejohnny. |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by lovingcritters on
Wednesday, 12th May 2004 @ 11:01:42 AM AEST
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BRAVO!BRAVO!BRAVO! STAND FOR ENCORE. What an imaginative poem.....how very created you are.......I loved the analogy, and then surprise is what you did to me.
Wonderful........Marvelous........and Great.
Exccept I hate..............alarm clocks.......no offense of course.
Thank you Ben for all you great comments on my poems.
I won't miss you from now on.....you're in my "favorites" for sure!
poetic hugs
consue
lovingcritters |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Saturday, 29th May 2004 @ 09:54:26 PM AEST
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| I see a bit of lost love in this poem, it is like you are dreaming of a lost love. very good write |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vicxy on
Saturday, 2nd October 2004 @ 09:21:42 PM AEST
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Great poem, I especialy like the italics
~Vicxy |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by eatfresh22 on
Wednesday, 13th October 2004 @ 04:33:10 PM AEST
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What an interesting piece. The structure was so fast that I kept reading it without anytime to suspect such a nice ending as you included here. It was a quick, yet deep read. I like it.
~Carrie~ |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by lil_noel09 on
Tuesday, 20th December 2005 @ 08:48:35 PM AEST
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| awesome! :D |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by JockPhillips on
Wednesday, 23rd August 2006 @ 09:42:45 AM AEST
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| Like a vampire with doing good, the poem is made of such. Keep reaching for the skies now and doing good. |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 5th December 2008 @ 04:36:10 PM AEST
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good job, good poem.
-phil |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by bubkin on
Saturday, 25th July 2009 @ 08:53:59 AM AEST
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| this is total brilliance ! |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by deusdeira on
Tuesday, 28th December 2010 @ 04:49:52 PM AEST
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| I like it, it has depth and good vocab. Nice job. |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by Livingawkwardly on
Tuesday, 25th March 2014 @ 05:57:03 PM AEST
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| this was really fun to read! I loved the twist at the end! Great job! |
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Re: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
(User Rating: 1 )
by Lionel on
Saturday, 14th February 2015 @ 09:06:26 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Very good. I loved the ending. |
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