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Pain
Contributed by
silent
on
Tuesday, 6th April 2004 @ 06:21:43 AM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
I feel so alone i want to die
Instead i sit forever within and try to cry
But i feel this weight bearing down and i don't try to stop it
I embrace, this feeling of agony, but i hate it
I feel so happy for so many around
So great they have finally found
Completion of sorts, i am so happy
With each piece of happiness i connect
Tightens the noose around my neck
Not that anyone cares anyway
I will just sit around, more breathless everyday
Maybe not for much longer....
Copyright ©
silent
... [
2004-04-06 06:21:43]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Pain
(User Rating: 1 )
by liquidsunshine on
Tuesday, 6th April 2004 @ 06:44:44 AM AEST
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Oh, silent... you made me cry... I remember the days when I felt that way. I had this facade up where everyone thought I was doing just fine, when really I was dying inside... Don't let it get to you as it did me. "Not that anyone cares anyway"
That's not true. I care. I'm sure I'm not the only one either.
Wonderfully written, full of emotion.
Love,
Chels |
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Re: Pain
(User Rating: 1 )
by Hurretje on
Tuesday, 6th April 2004 @ 06:46:58 AM AEST
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Sad, but very descriptive... Hope you will see the sun shine outside and that it may permeate in the darkest corners of your dimmed mind.
Hur |
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Re: Pain
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Tuesday, 6th April 2004 @ 07:03:40 AM AEST
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Your writing is very direct. I really like the last line of the first stanza. Embracing of the pain is something I can relate to. The last stanza is very descriptive as well. Nice work. Hang in there. The valleys don't last.
Stitch |
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Re: Pain
(User Rating: 1 )
by blueheart on
Tuesday, 6th April 2004 @ 07:06:05 AM AEST
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| Very emotional, I loved the way you potrayed your pain. Hope you feel better. |
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Re: Pain
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Tuesday, 6th April 2004 @ 08:05:39 AM AEST
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"not that anyone cares anyway"
i care, of course i care. and know what it is like to feel like this, but the time will pass...i promise you.
i can really understand the line "I embrace, this feeling of agony, but i hate it" ive been here so often.
an amazing write, so full of feeling and sadness. please stay strong,
luv n hugs forever, phil xxx |
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Re: Pain
(User Rating: 1 )
by The_Phantom on
Tuesday, 6th April 2004 @ 08:43:57 AM AEST
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Point taken strong write, very interresting write, good job.
The Phantom |
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Re: Pain
(User Rating: 1 )
by Avarice_Riot on
Tuesday, 6th April 2004 @ 09:39:23 AM AEST
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| Been there done that.....you've written it really well that the reader connects effortless with it. As usual, you rock. I'll help ya get your 'drunk poet' title one day when I'm of age :) |
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Re: Pain
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 6th April 2004 @ 01:53:19 PM AEST
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Pain is an emotional state we must all embrace at one point or another in our lives.Through vivid expression of your poetry,it helps soooooo daggone much to release it. It also helps to know that people DO care!!! And we here at ypdc are emotional poets who care!!! Hang in there, brighter days will arise the more you release the pain! Keep on expressing!!!
Angel always...godspeed...joni |
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