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Humanity 101
Contributed by
STRaNGe_LiNDSeY
on
Tuesday, 23rd March 2004 @ 06:17:07 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Outpouring strength caught, receding to my brain
Violently shaking and shunning the pain
Unpredictable hands the body has slain
Catastrophe and cataclysm note urges that maintain.
Shattered fragility and contemplation
Vigorous work and constant selfish presentation
Ravenous bloodshed in the name of mutilation
Posterior sacrifice gained leading conversation.
Forged documents of living resistance
Bargained plans lasting resilience
Xerox copy hand made silence
Ardent contemplated human cause of violence.
Temptation and suicidal tendencies erased
Depression and self-maiming formerly replaced
Justifiable formality blood lined mirrors faced
Connection to the terror civilization and individuality defaced.
Planned murder systematic deed
Generosities blatantly deforming heed
Overture and restoration blackening need
Allowing societies deposit of an evil seed.
Copyright ©
STRaNGe_LiNDSeY
... [
2004-03-23 18:17:07] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Humanity 101
(User Rating: 1 ) by Remy on
Tuesday, 23rd March 2004 @ 06:25:41 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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such writing, all-encompassing to the point of where i don't know where to begin commenting... superb! ;0)
~Remy~ |
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Re: Humanity 101
(User Rating: 1 ) by WorthlesSanity666 on
Tuesday, 23rd March 2004 @ 11:56:13 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I liked your poem! You did a wonderful job rhyming, something I can't ever do. I admire that because it didn't really sound like strained rhymes. (mine always do) Great job! keep it up! |
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Re: Humanity 101
(User Rating: 1 ) by Vitreous_Soul on
Saturday, 3rd April 2004 @ 06:28:16 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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The vision of bleakness you have painted with your words...conjuring images of the darkest parts that dwell within each of us. A perfect look at the true face of humanity.
As it that wasn't enough, I loved the rhymes you used. A nicely ironic twist really: the harmony of rhyme to convey the discordance of humanity. Simply beautiful.
Truly,
-Dan |
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