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Epitaph of a Fallen Hero

Contributed by forever_lonely on Monday, 8th March 2004 @ 11:19:57 AM in AEST
Topic: DarkPoetry



Entrapped a violent fire pregnant with the heat in which a fear of dying burns in the height of confusion

Each passing flame devours a memory derived from the regret of a child crying in the winds of time

Indelible memoria leaving a stain on my pride as each tear sheds a thousand years of pain from the death of my life

Tenacious in my dreams, each passing image like shackles on my wrists pulling at the thoughts that live so deep within

Epitaphs inscribed upon my chest, the sentence of a fallen hero in a prison of eluded ecstasy

To look for rest within each word, but to find a prism where each passing thought is split into a million more

As mirror of oblivion watches for perfection left only by the dreams of gods that sleep to live forever

Dreams that leave me dead and shackled by the truth that I will never rest from this eternal damnation that is death.




Copyright © forever_lonely ... [ 2004-03-08 11:19:57]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Epitaph of a Fallen Hero (User Rating: 1 )
by Rakerman1999 on Monday, 8th March 2004 @ 11:59:48 AM AEST
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"Dreams that leave me dead and shackled by the truth that I will never rest from this eternal damnation that is death"....profound, as is the entire write.

You've painted a masterpeice with your words.


Very well done
Larry


Re: Epitaph of a Fallen Hero (User Rating: 1 )
by Baronhawk on Monday, 8th March 2004 @ 02:13:59 PM AEST
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Fitting last words...for a fallen hero...I like this poem. I can almost taste that feverish quality that seems to glow from this artful poetry. But unless you are using this structure to create that sense of ferver pitch and uncertainty, I think that this excellent work could be more if arranged and broken down into stanzas or rhythmic punctuations.


Re: Epitaph of a Fallen Hero (User Rating: 1 )
by Kie on Monday, 8th March 2004 @ 05:46:10 PM AEST
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"To look for rest within each word, but to find a prism where each passing thought is split into a million more"

I thought this was brilliant!

Kie


Re: Epitaph of a Fallen Hero (User Rating: 1 )
by arden on Monday, 8th March 2004 @ 07:34:02 PM AEST
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this was awesome! i loved it! really good nice work.
Arden


Re: Epitaph of a Fallen Hero (User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on Wednesday, 10th March 2004 @ 05:25:49 PM AEST
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damn luke my mouth was hangin' open all the way through lol, what an incredible write!!! sooooooooooo pretty, sooooooooo beautiful, not enough stars for this one, it goes off scales! wow, hugs n' love nessa
keep 'em comin'

@->>->-


Re: Epitaph of a Fallen Hero (User Rating: 1 )
by STRaNGe_LiNDSeY on Tuesday, 30th March 2004 @ 04:13:51 PM AEST
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very good write... not wordy at all...




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