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The Dreams I Didn't Want
Contributed by
Avarice_Riot
on
Wednesday, 3rd March 2004 @ 02:39:50 AM in AEST
Topic:
Grief
|
We live life like it was offered to us on bended knee, never stopping to watch a frozen stone on earth,
Never contemplating the things we have, the ones we love, the air we breathe:
What if it were all snatched away from us in an instant?
Anomalies in light call out but we don't hear
They fell past me, faster, faster, as if in a snowstorm determined to kill me in an arctic white deafness.
I saw him falter, no time to react
We died together in the midst of chaos
But he rests while I bleed.
I paint icebergs but never can wipe away the crimson tips
I wish on all I know that they could mirror light again
Stop the haunting and let the living be
Let those who were meant to exist go
Still I court the fragments like they'd be able to be pieced as one again
Light on light
Life on life
to make the murdered breathe again.
Copyright ©
Avarice_Riot
... [
2004-03-03 02:39:50]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The Dreams I Didn't Want
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 3rd March 2004 @ 02:45:21 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| So much pain and anguish in your words. Your troubled emotions bleed through your words. Awesome poem!!! You are such a talented poet!!! |
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Re: The Dreams I Didn't Want
(User Rating: 0 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 3rd March 2004 @ 08:27:20 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Dear A_R, this is well written..there are good lines poetry..feeling of pain chillingly touches the heart.. venkat.. |
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Re: The Dreams I Didn't Want
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Thursday, 4th March 2004 @ 01:59:56 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| breathtaking! vivid! insightful! keep writing! hugs n' love nessa |
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Re: The Dreams I Didn't Want
(User Rating: 1 )
by twinkletoes on
Thursday, 4th March 2004 @ 08:19:20 PM AEST
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a Message)
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the first line or two can be THE most important in works, your fist line is my grabber, very thought provoking, well written, simple but still retains its air of mystery.
tt |
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Re: The Dreams I Didn't Want
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 9th March 2004 @ 01:46:01 AM AEST
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This does compel you to think of those that have lost their lives at the hands of evil. We do float through life not thinking of the pain and loss others feel unless we ourselves have to deal with the same loss and misery, This is an excellent piece of work.
Rita |
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Re: The Dreams I Didn't Want
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Thursday, 11th March 2004 @ 05:11:35 AM AEST
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a Message)
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vERY WELL WRITTEN!
LUV, HUGGS,
EMY
tHANKS FOR YOUR COMMNET ON MY WORK. |
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Re: The Dreams I Didn't Want
(User Rating: 1 )
by blueheart on
Thursday, 11th March 2004 @ 08:33:40 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| The agony you described so well. I wish I had read it sooner. Great poem. |
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Re: The Dreams I Didn't Want
(User Rating: 1 )
by arden on
Sunday, 14th March 2004 @ 03:45:56 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Awesomely done! i loved this. wonderfully written. keep it up.
Arden |
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Re: The Dreams I Didn't Want
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_Kalicharan on
Monday, 22nd March 2004 @ 07:17:17 AM AEST
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Deep and powerful write.....
Jenni |
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Re: The Dreams I Didn't Want
(User Rating: 1 )
by OMEGA_ on
Saturday, 10th July 2004 @ 09:18:31 AM AEST
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this one is a masterpeice
great work |
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Re: The Dreams I Didn't Want
(User Rating: 1 )
by deathdrop on
Friday, 6th August 2004 @ 05:03:34 AM AEST
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a Message)
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HAUNTING STUFF!
THIS IS AMAZING!
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