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My hearts fire
Contributed by
Shadow
on
Monday, 23rd February 2004 @ 07:11:57 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
Whose eye's now do grace my sight
That burn with the sun and all that is light
What pearl is this that I behold
And find it's shine sweeter than gold
What graceful glide does she yield
That dims the beauty of a golden field
With lips sweeter than the morning dew
This sweet bliss know to so few
Her radiant hair the very suns shine
O sweet deity I hold divine
That holds my heart that is no longer my own
These words I speak though I’m not alone
Hold me close my sweet dear
I give myself without fear
Hold my O Venus goddess of love
So sweet and gentle as a new born dove
Copyright ©
Shadow
... [
2004-02-23 19:11:57] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: My hearts fire
(User Rating: 1 ) by twinkletoes on
Monday, 23rd February 2004 @ 09:08:10 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
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A terrific read. I am sure the person who you may give it to will love it. If you go and have a read of Dreamweavers poetry, who I consider one of the best on the site you will see how in most cases her poetry reads smoothly. Although your poem reads smooth mostly, it still has a couple of very small bumps. In my case that happens because I dont read my work aloud, or bad editing (not editing) it helps to read aloud and it comes to you. For a person who has written for a year you are going great guns, hope you do well. Keep up the great work I will be watching you develop I hope.
Twinkletoes! |
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