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Sudden Tourment! Bleeing Brain! for both of us!!

Contributed by deathdrop on Wednesday, 18th February 2004 @ 10:32:56 AM in AEST
Topic: Grief

just started to recover,and now i've fallen again!
this drapping inner depth,
it's rapping my head!

of all the things that could happen,
it's not the thing that you'd exspect,
my settled earth is tipped up-side down,
i'm paralized in my neck!

not that any-one notest,
but i've self-harmed again,
only this time i was soo numb,
it didn't hurt my flesh!

i've locked my-self in my room,
i've tryed to calm down, i'm soo angry inside!
i've been for walks again and again,
every-time my anger creeped in...
i've pearced my skin,
awaited the pain,
but it never came....
there's just sorrowing pain,
inside my brain...

yesterday,i awoke,noise down stairs,
got dressed,went down there,all is gone,
no-ones around,not one sound!calling mum,
she's gone back up stairs,waiting around...
hearing shouting, mumbling sound...

it happened fast, but for-ever it did last,
mum was crying, as she ran past,
i was standing, below the landing,
asking what was wrong...
had to hold dots ears,
she's my sister and she's 9,
dot was terrible, i hate to see her cry!

doctor was called,
ambulance came,
echoing memories,
won't leave my brain...
stayed at a friends,
tryed to forget,
nothing can erase,
this tragic mess!
jarik's a mate,
he's said it's o'k,
i wanted to tell him,
i'd self-harmed again,
but some-how the words slipped away...
now i can't sleep,
i force my self to eat,
we're on holiday,
so my family isn't around me,
apart from my uncle,
whom i HATE!
and as for my aunty, she o'k, she's trying, but it won't stop, me,
need to let anger pass, want to trash,
want to smash, plates...
and stab my brain...!!!

Copyright © deathdrop ... [ 2004-02-18 10:32:56]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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