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Another Day?

Contributed by aboutdesouffle on Sunday, 8th February 2004 @ 12:48:38 PM in AEST
Topic: Suicide

I won't live to see another day
This gun will be placed at my head
The trigger pulled back
The bullet in my head
I'll be gone and you'll be glad
I won't be here to bug you at least
Blood will be shed - brains flung about
My cold dead corpse spread across the ground
No one will care for my soul has fled
No one will know til the very end
You won't know what's gone
For nothing was ever there

Copyright © aboutdesouffle ... [ 2004-02-08 12:48:38]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Another Day? (User Rating: 1 )
by Kusko on Wednesday, 23rd June 2004 @ 01:19:14 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

2 words:
STRONG VERBS

the poem has potential but only if you strengthen the verbs.

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