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suffocation
Contributed by
fallen_eyes
on
Monday, 2nd February 2004 @ 06:13:02 PM in AEST
Topic:
FriendshipPoetry
|
When your whole world seems to have sunken beneath you
And every step you make echos around you
The loneliness you felt begins to effect you
When you feel as though all your friends have now left you
And every breath you take now suffocates you
The surrow you are feeling will soon take over you
When you feel all the lights have been turned off near you
And every move you make will start to hurt you
The depression escapes when people wont see you
Now think yourself lucky for your never be alone
Now you're lucky for your life was not a lie
Now feel you are lucky that you still have a home
When time does pass by you please think of your friends
And know they'll never leave you when you need them
The happiness they can bring will balance the pain
So remember you can count on your friends time and time again
Copyright ©
fallen_eyes
... [
2004-02-02 18:13:02]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: suffocation
(User Rating: 1 )
by forever_lonely on
Monday, 2nd February 2004 @ 06:47:17 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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Hey tam
I really like this one its really nice to know ho people feel about friends and just always hope that i am one hehe
i love the structure of this piece, and i love the way you hold it together even though the flow isnt ready rhyme really great write
All the best
Luke xxxxxxxxxxx |
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Re: suffocation
(User Rating: 1 )
by poetrygodslove on
Thursday, 12th February 2004 @ 06:44:25 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| all of a sudden your without your friends and your lonely.. but then you think of them and your not anymore. you chose to think of the memories to get you through..wow.. I mean yeah we all have friends and they go on sometimes and memories linger on but there is a part of me when I read this.it is like your very very hurt and that you just want to just give up but you chose to keep going by thinking of the good memories.......... I love the lord and when I go through hard times I first think of the hard times. but then I know that I know that I end up asking the lord ot help me and then realize i should had asked him in the first place. why we go through so much instead of taking the short road to god and let him take care of everything.. sandy love your writes.. |
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