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Crying into a sea of passion
Contributed by
forever_lonely
on
Tuesday, 27th January 2004 @ 07:44:33 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
Drowing in guilt, he sat and he listened
Streming in love, you talked and you glistened
A decieving perception, a trust is now broken
Trying to hold back, from a word to be spoken
Into the darkness, Late as tomorrow
Him riding the waves, you crying in sorrow
A broken home opens, starting in silence
Developing from rows, and into hard violence
The violence persisted, and you began to break
He stood there and laughed, as you cried and you shaked
Into the darkness, the surfing began
On a beach of ill passion, in a bed of hot sand
Lost and confused, you went for the door
A body now broken, you could take no more
You left in a hurry, with nothing but hate
Into the darkness, looking for fate
He came back so late, with not even a care
Your life must have been, just so damn unfair
But one thing i ask, it was so hard to believe
If you loved me so much, then why did you leave?
Mummy i need you
Copyright ©
forever_lonely
... [
2004-01-27 19:44:33]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Crying into a sea of passion
(User Rating: 1 )
by lil_angel on
Tuesday, 27th January 2004 @ 07:50:33 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| awww soo sad...but great write! |
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Re: Crying into a sea of passion
(User Rating: 1 )
by Kie on
Tuesday, 27th January 2004 @ 08:05:22 PM AEST
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| The ending just got to me. This was so very sad to read. You write really well and you have alot of talent. I liked this poem. Kie |
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Re: Crying into a sea of passion
(User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on
Wednesday, 28th January 2004 @ 01:52:21 AM AEST
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| soo sad..written well.. |
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Re: Crying into a sea of passion
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vitreous_Soul on
Wednesday, 28th January 2004 @ 07:10:27 AM AEST
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Very sad poem, my friend. I can only imagine the pain. Still, a beautiful write, and a great expression of your feelings.
Truly,
-V.S. |
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Re: Crying into a sea of passion
(User Rating: 1 )
by Empty_Soul on
Wednesday, 28th January 2004 @ 05:54:51 PM AEST
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u dont need mummy, u need me. lol. another truely amazing poem, i am gonna cut ur fingers off so u can no longer write poems or type! lol, then my poems will look great!!! muhahahahahahahahaha!!.........sorry. lol.
amazing emotion, i would hate to be in this postion, good thing we havent had to go thru this......yet... lol hopefully never.
keep on fighting
never stop writing
john |
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Re: Crying into a sea of passion
(User Rating: 1 )
by CountryGirl on
Thursday, 29th January 2004 @ 06:06:36 PM AEST
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| This is so sad and brought tears to my eyes. The reason: it reminded me of my relationship with my daughter's father. When we first started dating it was great then it turned to pure rage. Abusive, physically and mentally. But finally after 5 years and 1 child, I left. Now, 8 years later, with a man, who treats me and my daughter great, I found my fate. |
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Re: Crying into a sea of passion
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Tuesday, 24th February 2004 @ 08:18:21 PM AEST
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| awwww...... so sad...... hugs n' love nessa |
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Re: Crying into a sea of passion
(User Rating: 1 )
by Deleterious_Dislike on
Wednesday, 2nd February 2005 @ 06:01:01 PM AEST
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I wasnt expecting the end at all...
I couldnt relate any of that to a mother figure..
I could a lover, kinda spoiled it for me lol.
I'll pretend i didnt read the last part:
That was beautiful, I read it and it felt real. x X x |
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