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Dreams
Contributed by
redwest802
on
Saturday, 17th January 2004 @ 08:25:11 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Have you woken from a dream,
And it would seem in this dream,
That you just woke from a dream,
Which in someway seemed obscene?
Know what I mean?
It plays havoc with your head.
When you’re lying in your bed,
And you dream that you are dead,
But you wake up in bed instead.
Cause really your not dead,
You just wishing it instead.
Because of the silky thread,
That’s been woven in your head.
But when you wake up in your bed,
And there’s a sheet covering your head,
You might think that you are dead,
But you wake again instead.
Your thought are all twisted,
Because the shrink you see insisted.
That your brain might be blistered,
From all the drugs you’ve injected.
But really it just sanity,
That’s causing this calamity,
And know one but you can remedy,
This posttraumatic lunacy.
But when your dream is really a dream,
And no one but you have seen,
What craziness might have been,
it makes you feel not keen.
to open your eyes in bed,
incase you’re really dead,
and not dreaming it instead,
these weird thoughts in your head.
Copyright ©
redwest802
... [
2004-01-17 20:25:11]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by Kindredblood_dragon on
Sunday, 18th January 2004 @ 12:39:27 AM AEST
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a Message)
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If this is what you dream then maybe my dreams are really placid.
It was a good poem but I found it to repetive, but hey who am I to critisize.
But a good write no the less.
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Re: Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 18th January 2004 @ 01:55:46 AM AEST
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| stop with the rhyming please... you have great talent... use that instead... |
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Re: Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by cryingonmyporch on
Sunday, 18th January 2004 @ 05:59:09 PM AEST
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It's crazy what you can dream but it's insane what you can think of. I liked it alot!
~Amy~ |
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Re: Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by hawaii06 on
Saturday, 24th January 2004 @ 02:29:07 PM AEST
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I really enjoyed this poem...although you could just write what's on your mind instead of always rhyming the words..yOU know? Well..it was a great poem anyway....
KEEP WRITING...
JAMIE |
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Re: Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by Cobalt on
Wednesday, 4th February 2004 @ 03:25:07 PM AEST
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| It was good but it did seem forced. I see alot of talent in your writing. Just over did the ryming scheme a bit. Nice nonetheless though. |
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