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Some People
Contributed by
bychristimsaved
on
Wednesday, 14th January 2004 @ 08:20:03 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
Some people dream
Some people live
There are those who take
And others who give
Some people frown
Some people smile
There are those who act now
And others who may take a while
Some people watch
Some people stare
There are those who can except
And others who cannot bare
Some people love
Some people hate
There are those who believe its luck
And others who believe its fate
Copyright ©
bychristimsaved
... [
2004-01-14 20:20:03]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Some People
(User Rating: 1 )
by Lessa on
Wednesday, 14th January 2004 @ 08:28:29 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| i like the flow of it and the words, but i dont undeerstand the point of it. |
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Re: Some People
(User Rating: 1 )
by dudleysgirl on
Wednesday, 14th January 2004 @ 08:56:46 PM AEST
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I agree with Lessa. This is nicely done, but doesn't feel finished. What is the lesson learned? What should we know by reading this? Where were you going with it?
Stanza 3, L3 - should be 'accept' (to take or receive what is offered); and S3, L4 - should be 'bear' (to support or hold up). Bring this to some conclusion, make the changes, and I would give this an A. Good beginning. Thanks for the read.
Judy |
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Re: Some People
(User Rating: 1 )
by CrucifiedAndLeft2Die on
Wednesday, 14th January 2004 @ 09:18:18 PM AEST
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| This was great, I loved the last line... |
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Re: Some People
(User Rating: 1 )
by Putteragain on
Thursday, 15th January 2004 @ 01:57:57 PM AEST
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this is my kinda poem loved it
it had a very easy flow to nicely said
michelle |
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Re: Some People
(User Rating: 1 )
by Wachumiri on
Saturday, 6th March 2004 @ 12:56:50 AM AEST
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I like it. I like the way it has no conclusion, the way the reader has to think of who he or she is.
Keep writing.
Take care.
David |
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