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End

Contributed by alecfernadez on Wednesday, 14th January 2004 @ 11:38:30 AM in AEST
Topic: Suicide



Its hard to explain the way I feel,
I'm feeling so numb to everything,
Nothing at all seems real,
So empty, as if encased my tin,
It scares me to be like this,
It hurts me to live this *****,
Its child abuse to let me live,
Its sad I cant forgive,
But why should I even bother,
I cant even tell my mother,
I cant take it, Just wanna cry,
Wanna be alone while I die,
Crawl under the porch,
Alone without a torch,
And listen to the crickets cry,
While face down and dead I lie
The dreams where I'm dying,
Are the best I ever had,
That Joy keeps me crying,
I know its kinda sad,
But life just hurts me too much,
I need to Leave before I get out of touch,
I want to do the world's most selfish act,
I want to die, and thats just a fact,
Because everything I see,
Everything that makes me cry,
Everything thats me,
Just makes me want to die
And even these old memories,
Still as real as the Incendiaries,
Surrounding me by my stake,
Make me wish memories were fake,
Because I remember, even the taste,
It hurts me, mentally and physically i'm in pain,
And they haunt me, again and again,
They just make me hate myself, even more,
The memories of me, that little whore,
I did things that I cant ever forget,
I remember things that make me upset,
And if thats really worth me living,
To keep on forgiving,
All the people who hurt me,
All the people who cant see,
All this pressure is crushing,
These tears are hurting,
I'm sorry...




Copyright © alecfernadez ... [ 2004-01-14 11:38:30]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: End (User Rating: 1 )
by poetrygodslove on Wednesday, 14th January 2004 @ 11:56:39 AM AEST
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ok you have a choice here..
one....stay thinking about your problems.talking about your problems telling others about your problems and they join your pitty party ....we all get in this way.....

or...
shake it all off....
ever heard about the donkey that failed in the well...
a farmer had been working all day and he became thirsty.figured his donkey needed a drank as well so he went to the well...well the donkey lean to much on the bricks and he failed in...the farmer didnt know what to do to get him out..he tried everything.he thought of his neighbors and asked them to come and help him.one man ended up saying why dont you just throw sand on him and bury him and get him out of his misery.so they all got buckets of sand and poured down on him.but the donkey he said to hisself they wont be burying me alive...so when the sand came down he SHOOK it off and stepped up and shook it off and stepped up soon he stepped out of the well...ask the lord to help you..look back in weeks and months maybe last year and see that you had these feelings before and he got you out of them...LOOK to him ask him.lean on him.you will see better days.the sand is all your troubles....just shake it off...REMEMBER the bible says...what we go through on earth only is temporary..but life with god will be eternity start building up your dreams and hopes in him and think about that kingdom and seek him more to let him place in you his kingdom...sandy oh by the way...you have a gift of poetry.love your writings how you put down your feelings...sandy


Re: End (User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on Wednesday, 14th January 2004 @ 12:03:13 PM AEST
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i understand.........


Re: End (User Rating: 1 )
by Estelle_Toh on Wednesday, 14th January 2004 @ 12:21:05 PM AEST
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this is heartwrenching..
i hope things turn out better for you..


Re: End (User Rating: 1 )
by Cobalt on Tuesday, 27th January 2004 @ 01:36:03 PM AEST
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Crap! Unreal! That was good. I liked it. It... Spoke like right at me. Totaly sweet.




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