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Commit Myself To Falling
Contributed by
Exodus-On-Life
on
Thursday, 8th January 2004 @ 01:07:55 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Sat up in a pool of fear
Sitting and reaching beyond a stare
You carried me halfway
Still, you left me there
I feel the strain of the consciousness
And the pains of everyday
I could be happy forever
And you could have your way
Instead of all these ugly things
You'd prefer me dead
I'll take my chances with inhibition
As I commit myself, sick in the head
Falling even faster
You'd catch me if you could
I'm falling even after
You couldn't catch me, like you would
Feeling the pain of forever
Pushing even further the ache of strain
You can feel my anger crushing
Ensuing all the echoes of pain
Smile for me
As I start to take away
All these things you take for granted
Falling through forever, even today
Copyright ©
Exodus-On-Life
... [
2004-01-08 13:07:55]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Commit Myself To Falling
(User Rating: 1 )
by alecfernadez on
Thursday, 8th January 2004 @ 01:12:18 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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This is a pretty darn cool dark poem. Theres a sort of breathless air to it, kinda weird, and disturbing at the same time. And you can feel your passion in writting this just shine out of the words.
Yet again, another great write
Alec Fernandez
(Time to take a stand, and read and comment on more poetry, laziness is not an option) |
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Re: Commit Myself To Falling
(User Rating: 1 )
by Putteragain on
Thursday, 8th January 2004 @ 01:17:56 PM AEST
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a Message)
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this is a really intense writ ei usually dont read the darker stuff but the title caught my eye glad i did it kept me enthralled all the way through and it is good
michelle |
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