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Book Of Life
Contributed by
Stephen_Rutherford
on
Saturday, 27th December 2003 @ 06:01:17 AM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
|
My life has been told like a story time and time agian
My life is like a book that has always been
A Book that will never be read
But has always been said
The pain that i suffer will always be amist
Yet this book that will be read will never be missed
Be missed by the ones that matter
For this pain once felt will leave life your shattered
The pain of a lost love will always be felt
For when this book is closed your heart will never melt
No one will ever truly understand anothers pain until they read this book
For they will finaly relieze that this book is thier life if they just take a look
To take a look beond the pages there is alway an end
For once you close this book there is only one true trend
The Trend to end Life itslef, Because once your love is gone
All you can do is sit back and yawn
as you fall asleep to my story and dream about how your life will end.
By: Me Stephen Rutherford, and with Help From Kyle Apple
Copyright ©
Stephen_Rutherford
... [
2003-12-27 06:01:17]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Book Of Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by dumfries on
Saturday, 27th December 2003 @ 06:43:52 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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With the exception of some misspelling. It is a well crafted and thought out piece.
I always enjoy a good read.
DUMFRIES |
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Re: Book Of Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by EmSal on
Saturday, 27th December 2003 @ 07:25:16 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Yep a good write I thought. Your write is quite true though ey...
Emma. |
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Re: Book Of Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by aernby on
Saturday, 27th December 2003 @ 09:04:33 AM AEST
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a Message)
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some good craftmanship here, nicely thought out.
mechanics are weak
1- Random line lengths
2- No punctuation
3- Capitalization
The random line length is especially problematic
when using rhyme
Punctuation helps you reader understand what you are saying.
Capitalizing the first letter of each line of a poem is an old convention, the current convention capitalilzes as per prose, i.e. the first word in a sentence.
Mechanics aside this is nicely crafted, and well written
aern+ |
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Re: Book Of Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Saturday, 27th December 2003 @ 03:00:07 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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I understood this just fine and its a great piece of work.
michelle |
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