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Seven notebooks of goodbye.

Contributed by stargazer on Wednesday, 24th December 2003 @ 09:06:29 PM in AEST
Topic: goodbyepoetry

A crude laugh and a fake smile,
it was enough to fool anyone.
It was who I was,
it was what I was.
It was written in black and white...
every hidden corner of my life.
Something intelligent to say about everything,
never having to worry
about saying the wrong thing.
But when it came to my own life,
it was a complete and utter wreck.
At night I could not sleep,
and my only sense of security
was the words I could put on a page.
The words were so simple,
but the meaning ran deep with emotion.
I was a thirteen year old
lost in the mind of someone else.
They didn't think I noticed
that our eyes never connected,
but I did... and it hurt.
My life had been like an old photograph,
captured in one instance,
but never to be forgotten.
No one ever dared to say anything,
fearing what I might say in return.
They figured their silence would help me...
they thought I could handle it on my own.
But I couldn't.
I was wallowing in my own self pity,
I needed to tell someone,
but no one was ever around.
My writing was always there...
it never once gave up on me,
it was the one thing that was always there...
too listen but never talk back.
Time went by...
I began to sleep at night
and my smile was not a forced smile any longer.
My writing however...
I did not need it like before.
I became my own worst critic,
I didn't understand it...
and I became angry for not being good enough.
So I gave up...
and this is where it has left me.

With seven notebooks of goodbye,
and a smile that is for real.

Copyright © stargazer ... [ 2003-12-24 21:06:29]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Seven notebooks of goodbye. (User Rating: 1 )
by lovingcritters on Thursday, 25th December 2003 @ 12:17:27 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Oh My, I can't imagine anyone with your talent ever giving up! I really enjoyed this poem my friend...and it is not the end....it's just the beginning for you! The more poetry you write...the more you view....the more you view your poetry...the better poetry you will view! Works wonders...never stop writing...you are really good. I promise you!
Lovingcritters
ConSue
Good Luck to you!

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