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Debauchery
Contributed by
alisialynn
on
Monday, 8th December 2003 @ 06:33:59 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
Debauchery
Drunken belligerent debauchery
In an instant
As I drank from the bottle
Poison slipping down my throat
Grabbing my neck
A choke hold a garrote
You, as an image as I close my eyes
I drink more of the spirit
I silently called you but, you did not hear it
Thin and thirsty, call me sierra like the desert
I laugh at a funny joke. I feel funny
My body tingles all over
Reality slips into coarse harsh delusion
I pretend that you love me
You want me to call you
Rejection seems foreign concept, no refusing
I dial and you don’t answer
Message after message
This phone is only an extension of this cancer
The night passes over us
Our demons come out of their closets
Everyone’s drama like a wave
You were my master all evening
Dominating me, I am your thought slave
I’m blind to my own patterns of behavior
I don’t realize that this discourse is like all others
Have I changed so little?
Expunge me from your life, take on new lovers!
Make me realize so I can move on
You won’t and I will stay like this
I can’t change, I relish in my obsession
Everyday hoping to see you
Drunk on dick, choking on your harsh reprisals
You have become my reasoning, a million calls
That evening
I couldn’t give up
Sightless from the drink
I needed to see you
I should have stopped to think
It’s typical really, the point of all this
It’s typical for drunken people to forget
I drive to your house
It takes a half hour to get there
Where was my head? Why did I dare?
At the last minute I started to change my mind
This wasn’t fair to you
Reality set in for a moment, it was four o’clock
But, I was really very intoxicated so I started to knock
I heard you get up
And you knew it was me
You didn’t want to answer but, did anyways
You were a jerk and I acted lame
I tried to steady myself by pushing on your door
I swear I wasn’t trying to barge in
I just wanted it to stop moving….The Floor
Joking now but, seriously, I’m serious
This queer sort of mission set out before me
Get to your house, see you, and talk about things
What things? I can’t remember now.
In my sobriety things aren’t clear
Except my longing for you to be near
You had contempt in your eyes
It was obvious and plain to see
My voice emanated what I had been thinking
It was all garble and made no sense
But, it was said nonetheless
You dismissed me and yelled a small bit
I think you should have kissed me and expelled your need to fit
I knew when I knocked what you would say
But, I had come so far and wanted my way
I left and hadn’t made it passed your doorstep
I felt ridiculous, embarrassed, under your contempt
I’m so unbelievably sorry for my typical behavior
For my debauchery, for my endeavor
I promise it won’t happen again
I will practice self control
I won’t drink vodka, JD, and Bacardi Gin
O.k. that’s a lie
But, I promise I will DIE
Before I call you
Or stop over
Before I hurt myself
Or worse another
Copyright ©
alisialynn
... [
2003-12-08 18:33:59]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Debauchery
(User Rating: 1 )
by MrWrite on
Monday, 8th December 2003 @ 06:41:48 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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| Wow. I felt as if I had gone through what you described. Brilliant write. Keep up the good work. |
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