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Cold and Bored with Insanity

Contributed by Calista on Thursday, 13th November 2003 @ 11:11:40 PM in AEST
Topic: EmotionalPoetry



Cold and Bored With Insanity

Empty soul
Full alertness
Empty holes
Full conscience
Empty heart
Full gap
Empty, apart
Full of crap
We build up to the point
When wee need to explode
Walking around carrying a full load
Chanting the same mantra
In my head for years
Words to calm me, to tame fears
Hold tears, dull shears
Over and over and over again
By the end of the day
I can’t remember what made me begin
Every night before I lay me down to sleep
I pray to God tomorrow’s mine to keep
But the sun will set, I will lose my bet
I’d be a poor girl on a cold hill
Watching people below me get grilled
Before I learned and accepted
That my life’s intercepted
I never dreamed of this for me
Cold and bored with insanity.
As a child I wanted to be happy
Everything was pretty, everything was there.
I never thought I’d be alone in a zone
When I’d cry on the phone
Listening to dial tone
Because I can’t hear a thing but a moan
As children we are naive and pure
What happens when we change views
And stop hoping for a cure?
When we pay attention to news and cues,
Rather than our hearts and souls.
I’m tired of stepping into deeper and deeper holes
Don’t you see
There’s nothing here for me
But a person I can’t be
And everybody’s pity
Every time you look at me
Talk to me, think of me
I’m returning to safety
I’m locking up my free
Waves of pain, of hate
Of tears and a quiet state
Changing as the moon
From full to half
Tears now, smiles soon
All it takes is a look or a laugh
You’re okay, walk, breathe, walk
My mantra, my head
My need to be dead, be led
And my wish to unlock
Let free, fly high, and see me.
Please...
I never dreamed this for me
A routine of pain so common
I’m cold and bored with insanity.




Copyright © Calista ... [ 2003-11-13 23:11:40]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Cold and Bored with Insanity (User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on Friday, 14th November 2003 @ 12:09:44 AM AEST
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Very good writing altho sad.
I do know the feelings from time to time but now my days are much brighter now that I'm happy with myself.
Hang tuff, please?
peace, joy, luv,
emy


Re: Cold and Bored with Insanity (User Rating: 1 )
by JamesStockdale on Tuesday, 2nd April 2019 @ 10:28:54 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Wow, what a beginning!!!!
Crazy good albeit sad....JS




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