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The Problem with English

Contributed by norm on Tuesday, 11th November 2003 @ 07:02:23 PM in AEST
Topic: HumorPoetry



I think the guy who used the term,
'He wants to steal my thunder'
Unless the meaning is quite clear,
He must have made a blunder.

The guy who said, "Give me five"
He also makes me wonder,
Wants he, me, to take five days
To sit around and ponder?

I've heard the ladies often say,
"Her skin's like peach and cream,"
The meaning: She's a fuzzy face
The cat licks in a dream.

It was said by someone once ,
"Would you hold your horses?"
A guy like me from metro town,
Knows not what form a horse is.

How about the one who says,
"I'll see you in a minute",
Are they saying they'll take a mo'
And put you right within it?

Like one time a gent, he said,
"Hey, Mister, You're a pip!"
A pip, indeed, a little seed
It made me want to flip.

And on and on the language goes,
I don't know where it's heading,
How we ever learned these idioms,
I guess it's schools abetting.

People come from foreign lands,
It's english, they should learn,
They'll be here fifty years or more
before they will discern.




Copyright © norm ... [ 2003-11-11 19:02:23]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: The Problem with English (User Rating: 0 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 11th November 2003 @ 10:32:45 PM AEST
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LOL..Leave it to Norm and "bob's your uncle"
Its sooo true though,so many of these lil sayings and half the world dont know what the heck it all means...Cant even begin to imagine the frustration of someone with an ethnic background trying to understand the words of Americans and Aussies :)Neat write
LW


Re: The Problem with English (User Rating: 1 )
by PoloRM on Tuesday, 11th November 2003 @ 11:39:22 PM AEST
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Don't get me started
I have idioms charted
We have a lebanese one that isn't fair
It goes like:
What is there that isn't there?

(translated from lebanese)
True Meaning: What's up?


Re: The Problem with English (User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on Wednesday, 12th November 2003 @ 12:36:35 AM AEST
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No problem ..well done.. venkat


Re: The Problem with English (User Rating: 1 )
by lovingcritters on Wednesday, 12th November 2003 @ 04:08:52 PM AEST
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Norm this poem out does them all
I just laughed, and roared, 'twas like going to an "English Ball!" What truth, What candor..colloquialisms galore! When I visited down south, they said, "May I carry you to the store?"(In a car of course! )Then I went shopping and they asked me if I'd like a "poke?" I was sure they'd bloody my nose..but that meant a sack for your clothes. As for a drink in Wyoming known as a "ditch" and everywhere else it's a water high...what a stitch. When driving on the road in Wyoming you don't drive into a "ditch" along side the road...it's known as "borrow-pit" here..because they had to borrow the dirt to make the road! And as for poor foreigners who try to learn...don't leave out the emphasis on different words, like HELP!!!!
May I help you? or LOOK OUT!!!! Would you like to look out? or go to "Look Out Mountain in Tennessee...I'm so glad you shared with me. I'd forgotten all those funny idioms...Thanks for reminding we!!!!
ConSue


Re: The Problem with English (User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on Thursday, 13th November 2003 @ 08:59:56 AM AEST
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dearest norm, this poem is great as the crow flys and right on:) hugs n' love nessa




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