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Looming in My Soul
Contributed by
hope
on
Sunday, 12th October 2003 @ 05:18:28 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
The pains of the past
How they loom in my soul
They have different names
Each story untold
They drift and they drag
Filling their bags
Each happy feeling marked with a tag
They stuff them all in
Squeeze if they must
All my good feelings
Disappearing at once
And then deep inside they pull and they pry
Then release their hatred all through my inside
It floats through my veins
Out my mouth it seeps
Words of bitterness is all that I speak
I have no strength left to endure
My heart has grown so very sore
Copyright ©
hope
... [
2003-10-12 17:18:28]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Looming in My Soul
(User Rating: 1 )
by Philipa on
Sunday, 12th October 2003 @ 07:02:46 PM AEST
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Hope, I think I can understand what your saying however, it is tough to get past the painfull feelings stuffing the happy ones in a bag. If your using the bags for each feeling can you make it clearer that the memories are doing the shoving. Perhaps I may not understand the metaphors very well. Please feel free to PM me if I'm not making sense.
Philipa |
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Re: Looming in My Soul
(User Rating: 1 )
by lovingcritters on
Monday, 13th October 2003 @ 04:13:55 AM AEST
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Oh my, what an impressive write. You have a wonderful way of expressing your feelings and telling others how you feel! That's a great gift to be able to get in touch with your soul and heart and then write it all down. What a grand expression of your heart! It was sore...that was so truthful, and I've never read that in any poetry ever. But I've felt it, and I can empathize with you....You're so beat up inside....your heart literally gets sore.
You have much talent...and I'm looking forward to more of your poems. This one was excellent, Indeed!
lovingcritters
Connie Sue
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Re: Looming in My Soul
(User Rating: 1 )
by Wachumiri on
Thursday, 22nd January 2004 @ 01:37:27 AM AEST
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Take strength in God. He will make you whole.
Take care.
In God's love,
David |
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