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altered states
Contributed by
Merry
on
Tuesday, 30th September 2003 @ 04:05:00 AM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
|
I couldn’t read it, I couldn’t write it
so I left it sitting on the kitchen table
next to a half eaten apple and the empty sugar bowl
it is muggy outside and the trees look uncomfortable
their leaves turning brown and they can’t do anything about it
pulling up errant weeds, what is the use I think
as I watch an ant make his way home
I think about killing it – just because I can
but he keeps moving away from me and lives
to be an ant another day – escapes my cruelty
and I used to believe in fairytales
the sun hurts my eyes and I pray for rain
to wash this uncomfortable feeling away
emotions churning like an old washing machine
the sloshing of self-pity spills over the top
and I’ll let go in a day or two
see things in a different light
accept what I cannot change and all that happy crap
what else can I do -
~merry~
Copyright ©
Merry
... [
2003-09-30 04:05:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: altered states
(User Rating: 1 )
by LovingWhispers on
Tuesday, 30th September 2003 @ 04:14:15 AM AEST
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a Message)
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sorry but cant help LMAO@all that happy crap
(((huggers))) I really like this poem..it comes across as everyday feelings for one person or another..you really express yourself well.Nice one. and chin up...coz it seems you have a great sense of humour and thats a neat quality ;) |
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Re: altered states
(User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on
Tuesday, 30th September 2003 @ 05:34:08 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| well done.. venkat |
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Re: altered states
(User Rating: 1 )
by Rakerman1999 on
Tuesday, 30th September 2003 @ 09:38:21 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Merry...you have a way of writing that brings your thoughts to life. The details are so vivid. Lines like...... " emotions churning like an old washing machine
the sloshing of self-pity spills over the top
and I’ll let go in a day or two
see things in a different light
accept what I cannot change and all that happy crap
what else can I do - "
Makes me laugh and think....thats what writing is all about. Well done. Larry |
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Re: altered states
(User Rating: 1 )
by MoonlitAngel on
Tuesday, 30th September 2003 @ 11:25:47 AM AEST
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All that happy crap... LOL... you gotta love it. Such great description and imagery. You painted a picture in my mind, you evoked emotions, and hey, you made me laugh too! Great write.
~ Moonlit |
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Re: altered states
(User Rating: 1 )
by roisin on
Tuesday, 30th September 2003 @ 01:15:14 PM AEST
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a Message)
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tis life merry...what a difference a day or two make...an excellent write
rosie |
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Re: altered states
(User Rating: 1 )
by Walt on
Tuesday, 30th September 2003 @ 04:46:33 PM AEST
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Your words trigger thoughts, create images, remind me of the days gone those yet to come, but then I would have killed the ant.
Walt |
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Re: altered states
(User Rating: 1 )
by Crow on
Wednesday, 1st October 2003 @ 05:06:17 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| good write, i`m so glad the ant lived! Crow |
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Re: altered states
(User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on
Wednesday, 1st October 2003 @ 07:53:39 PM AEST
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hmm I liked this especially the part with the ant I hope your feelin better now. Good poem.
Bobo (Joel) |
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