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FIRST ABANDONMENT
Contributed by
jaeann
on
Thursday, 18th September 2003 @ 10:05:00 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
I would ask you
why you never ran.
I would ask
what it felt like to be you
back then.....
your mind growing dark....
your spirit emptying....
void of any positives....
your body wracked by excesses.
I would ask
what revenge feels like....
revenge past the point of retribution.
I would ask
what reckless....
carefree
and selfish felt like.
I would ask you
what it felt like to be important....
in your service to country....
the finality of one moment of pride from
a distanced family.....
important in an important man's bed....
then please tell me
how did his betrayal feel....
your breakdown....
what darkness enveloped your mind.
I would ask you
what disgrace feels like....
forced into a union of mockery ending in a
devastated existence.
I would ask
what it felt like
to have your freedom suspended....
life suspended...
ripped apart because of circumstances.....
your life of circumstances.
I would ask you how.....
how did you live the rest of your years knowing a part of you was
accessible to all others but to you....
what possessed you
to bring another into your world
without benefit of normalcy.
I would ask
why you would give the pedastal if you were not to retain ownership...
for ages I was yours only....
all you ever needed.....
I was your everything......
your all.........
all you ever did was let others have control...
turning your head just to get through........
not seeing is not believing............
grateful and ignorant by choice.
I would ask you
how could one profess protection
then continue to relenquish to evil
over and over
and over.........
beyond comprehension.
I would ask you
why I was never a priority......
never again enough.....
enough to take me past evil into peace...
safety....
I used to be enough.
I would ask you
what I did wrong.
I would ask
once your eyes recognized the truth....
and the loss....
did your heart as well.
I would ask you
if your efforts to leave
came too late.
I would ask
what it felt like to watch me grow away....
never saying you were sorry.
I would ask
if it was easier to pass over knowing
she forgave you
of a past and its' actions
beyond your control.
I would ask you
if you knew what it felt like
to never be apologized to....
for a lifetime of missed prevention.
I would ask you
if you knew in the end....
did you know I was not there....
or did it only matter
in the absence of another.
I would ask you
if your endeavor to visit me in the light
was to comfort.....
or to warn of heartache to follow.
I would ask
if you were waiting for her....
easing her transition....
did you walk in her garden.....
teach the soul to be free once again.
I would ask you
do you miss me.....
as I would only hope.....
know to be true.
I would ask you
if you heard me when I said
I forgive you....
Copyright ©
jaeann
... [
2003-09-18 10:05:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: FIRST ABANDONMENT
(User Rating: 1 )
by LovingWhispers on
Thursday, 18th September 2003 @ 10:10:42 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Ohhh....totally heart wrenching.Your rivers of pain must run deep,yet you are strong and fight the currents.Forgiveness..true forgiveness is divine (((huggers))) |
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Re: FIRST ABANDONMENT
(User Rating: 1 )
by Ilhar on
Thursday, 18th September 2003 @ 10:59:39 AM AEST
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a Message)
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wow...the pain expressed here is overpowering...a very good write...I am glad you found a way to forgive
Shari |
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Re: FIRST ABANDONMENT
(User Rating: 1 )
by lovingcritters on
Thursday, 18th September 2003 @ 12:51:01 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Like a river of pain....torrents of water....racing over past rocks! Devastating! Horrid! Such torment.....and then the final blow.....I forgive you.....whether she heard you or not Jaymee she wouldn't have understood...for if she had....she never would have done any of that to her daughter that was so kind she could say "I forgive you!" But I'm so happy you did...for you, Jaymee not for her....She will never again be able to control you now!
Warm Hugs and much Love too
Connie |
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Re: FIRST ABANDONMENT
(User Rating: 0 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 18th September 2003 @ 02:23:58 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
from me to you, when my body is dust and my soul is free, whe I no longer have to walk in this world with pain, I will forgive. before I do I`ll be on equal ground. I apologize Crow
super write |
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Re: FIRST ABANDONMENT
(User Rating: 1 )
by wyrd_faerie on
Saturday, 20th September 2003 @ 12:49:17 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
this is fantastic...and so, so true...i feel you...
I would ask you
if you knew what it felt like
to never be apologized to....
not once in my lifetime, never has my mother apologised to me...this is an incredible poem, i love it, well done
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