|
Menu
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
Kill it! Cut it! and Eat it Alive!
Contributed by
forsakensoul
on
Saturday, 28th June 2003 @ 12:35:00 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
I rip her heart out, watch as it bleeds
take from her, what she most needs!
I wonder why I did it, while she cries
I weep for her, while she dies!
There was no reason, there is nothing to know
and I can only water with my tears, the torture that I sow!
So I hear her scream, while her blood flows
I have started my own demise, as her hatred grows!
That was just the beginning, only a start
Next I take out a knife, and cut up her heart!
It tries to pump, but it shall never last
There is no end to this, She cannot escape the past!
Every now and then, she still will weep
and I throw her heart on the fire, while she tries to sleep!
But it is still not done, she still is not beat
So I take it from the fire, and have myself something to eat!
It is so bitter, after all that I have done
Oh what irony is this, that now I have her heart, and I know she is the one!
So I grovel, I beg at her feet
Knowing I am not good enough, to even be her piece of meat!
She is forever pained, her heart never heals
Yet she takes me back, because of some love that she feels!
Copyright ©
forsakensoul
... [
2003-06-28 12:35:00] (Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment. That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Kill it! Cut it! and Eat it Alive!
(User Rating: 1 ) by norm on
Saturday, 28th June 2003 @ 01:27:05 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
The poem is great...but you are naughty
|
|
|
Re: Kill it! Cut it! and Eat it Alive!
(User Rating: 1 ) by Ilhar on
Saturday, 28th June 2003 @ 02:10:18 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
well written, I think I have met your twin
Shari |
|
|
Re: Kill it! Cut it! and Eat it Alive!
(User Rating: 1 ) by Calbob on
Saturday, 28th June 2003 @ 04:26:25 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
This poem is childishly written, the style of two lines that ryhme is pretty simple. I didnt like your use of exclamation marks! The visual imagry in this piece was.....cheesey/gory. I guess it was some kind of metaphor or something but it left me wanting to vomit.
-calbob |
|
|
Re: Kill it! Cut it! and Eat it Alive!
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Sunday, 29th June 2003 @ 06:09:19 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
First I just wanna say calbob (and im not tryin to pick a fight) but it is still a poem and in poems, ppl express themselves so what they write no matter how crud it is, it's still great because it expresses feelings. True poetry wouldn't be poetry if ppl critisized it and the writer changed it to suit what the readers wanted. Secondly, I think I have met ur twin too lol. Nah just jokes, it was a very honest write and I respect you for writing so honestly, it can't have been easy 2 write about urself that way. Great work, I liked it
luv stacey
(p.s. when I read the title, I thought it was about animal hunting lol) |
|
|
Re: Kill it! Cut it! and Eat it Alive!
(User Rating: 1 ) by LadyDama on
Wednesday, 2nd July 2003 @ 04:04:29 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
ah, for some reason, at first, this poem flashed the movie "from hell" across my brain... very explicit and brutal, but digging deeper, i see the love behind the hate... intriguing and thought provoking... in my opinion a very poignant write... blessings... |
|
|
Re: Kill it! Cut it! and Eat it Alive!
(User Rating: 0 ) by Former_Member on
Saturday, 5th July 2003 @ 02:45:14 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
At first the poem sort of turned me off because of its gory details, but once i read furthure i found it very interesting and deep. i enjoyed this poem! keep up the good work |
|
|
Re: Kill it! Cut it! and Eat it Alive!
(User Rating: 1 ) by punkwthn on
Monday, 7th July 2003 @ 02:59:11 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Well I thought it was a great poem S. I think it has excellent rhythm and of course a deep meaning to it. Good job.*~ |
|
|
Re: Kill it! Cut it! and Eat it Alive!
(User Rating: 0 ) by Former_Member on
Thursday, 10th July 2003 @ 12:13:19 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Then why don't you treat her better? |
|
|
|