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Heartfelt Contempt

Contributed by derickkk on Tuesday, 15th July 2014 @ 07:29:52 AM in AEST
Topic: EmotionalPoetry



I remember what you told me
before you went out on your own.
Sometimes to keep it together,
you've got to leave it alone.
One day
we'll wave 'hello' and wish we'd never waved goodbye.
I want to remember how you've made me laugh
somedays cry
never want to forget how special and different you are
how you've touched my heart in a way that no one else could
I know that i didn't mean it
and I know that i think saying sorry will make it better,
but that's not how the world works.
It's an imperfect world and feelings just don't go away that fast.
So either you never really loved me
or you loved me ? i hope
Well let me tell you,
go ahead and leave if you have to
but in the end
you will see my mistake and come back.
I hope
But you know what?
I won't be here.
i will be in the center of your heart
Why am I holding onto this?
I know there'll be nothing more to us than exception.
I need to keep myself strong.
I can't let you break me more
Before you leave,
promise me one thing
that you won't forget what we had.
Because it was special I know it was
if I could go back in time,
you know I would go back to you
I made the choice to finally go because I can't stand this pain.
It's time for my last tear to fall and me to smile again.
I sat there and stared at you.
I just couldn't understand
how such an amazing person could be in my life.
And then all of a sudden I got extremely scared.
You kissed me,
and told me not to worry,
there was no way you'd ever leave me.
I felt a sense of comfort.
believed you.
That is, until i left.
no more crying. I can't cry anymore.
don't take my hand this time
just go please and don't look back.
Because I know if you did,
I would come running back to you.
No more loneliness and heartache,
no more crying myself to sleep,
no more wondering about tomorrow.
Won't you come back to me?
Come back to me.
Do I ever cross your mind anytime?
Do you ever wake up reaching out for me?
Do I ever cross your mind anytime?
I miss you
all the time
All I ever wanted was to make you happy.
I can only do that by stepping aside.
I just have one favor to ask of you...
remember me.
and so if I have to leave you,
I want you to know that in the end,
it wasn't because I stopped caring,
it's because you stopped being a friend.
The hardest mile I've ever walked was the one away from you.
So maybe you were special,
and maybe you were supposed to be the one,
but then again maybe you were just like the rest of them
only you took my heart with you when you left.
From the moment he said hello, I could see goodbye in his eyes
How can I say goodbye to you without losing myself too?
I love you enough to let you go,
but do you love me enough to come back?
i turned away from opportunities to sit and talk things through
but now when I say I'm leaving you,
have so much to prove.
So long to all my pain.
Good night to my heartache.
Goodbye sorrow.
I won't cry no more.
I'm leaving tomorrow.
couldn't even say I'm sorry for all the hurt and pain i caused you
Now I am supposed to give my deepest sympathy?
I had enough of crying
I'm tired of all my lying
I refuse to not let you take advantage of me,
so i now Learn the Hard Way
It's so hard to say goodbye to you.
My heart knows the words,
they just won't pump up to my lips.
So, here I am again
ending yet another pathetic excuse
it always seems one thing is always the same about it.
I'm always the one who walks away from it all.
Away from the person who always said she would never let me go.
once a gain, I'm walking away...
once again, your not stopping me.
every time I see you my heart falls to the floor
can i stop you from walking away
I want to tell you everything,
tell you how I feel,
tell you that sometimes when you're not even noticing,
I look into your eyes,
and when I do,
it's not my love for you I see, its my need.
Sometimes what may be the best thing for you to do,
sometimes that's the hardest thing for you to do.
And that's real because I know I love you,
I know how I feel about you.
But I also know that don't make everything all right.
And for that reason I gotta say goodbye
Maybe I was just a stepping stone for you to get to that point in your life
where you'd figure out what you wanted,
or didn't want.
So to prove to you
for the rest of my life
I love you and all I want is for you to be happy,
I'll walk away.
kiss me hard because this will be the last time that you will let me
You will be back someday
As you walk away I see the fire in your eyes
and I can hear the laughter in your voice as you watch my heart break.
I'm frozen.
I can't find the words to tell you that I hate you.
I can't tell you how I wish you would just leave my life forever.
And I can't tell you how much I hope she hurts you.
So instead I tell you I love you.
Hoping that the fire in your eyes die down,
the laughter in your voice becomes tears in your eyes,
you turn around and unbreak my heart.
Only to realize that wishes often dont come true,
and hearts are more often then not, broken.
I stand there and watch you walk away.
I think of a while ago,
we might have had it all,
I was so stupid then,
you needed time to grow.
But now just as things change,
as well my feelings do.
In time things rearrange
I'm never going to stop chasing you.
I feel safe around her,
and she's leaving.
I can't go any further down this love road and have my heart broken.
I never thought saying two words would be so hard.
I said them a thousand times,
but it has never ever been so hard.
That night as we stood in your drive way I didn't want the night to end...
I knew those words were coming
I didn't wanna hear them.
You said them then I said them too.
I turned and walked away
tears in my eyes
I will never forget that night I had to say good bye."
one more thing before you go,
in case you didn't know,
I wouldn't trade you for the world
I wish there was something I could say or do,
I can resist anything but the temptation from you,
Id rather walk alone and chase you around,
I'd rather fall myself then let me drag you down."
Goodbye is too good a word,
so I'll just say fare thee well,
i have wasted your precious time,
but don't think twice it's all right."
I always wanted to try for you..
I'd have done anything and more.
But now you're so far out of reach.
I've tried to hold on..
but I just can't anymore.
I'm tired of trying for something that never gets any better.
I'm tired of the pain.
So from now on
will we....?
live our lives apart from each other,
pretend we don't remember everything we've shared.
But I would've done anything for you..and I still would.
I feel like I am holding you back.
missing out on something else by hanging on with me.
don't want you to miss anything
Love hurts.
It takes strength to keep it going
right now,
I just don't have the strength or the will power.
Please just try to understand
I love you,
I really do,
yet. i still hurt you
But thats ok,
I can walk away.
I cant let you leave because in the end,
I'll know you didnt leave because I wasnt pretty enough,
or smart enough,
or nice enough.
You left me because il never know
cant make up my mind
i did do everything wrong,
except maybe choose the wrong love
I don't get how you can just walk away from this
We've worked so hard to be together,
we've broken every rule they could have given us,
and now you're just leaving...
I thought I meant more to you
maybe i still do.
I have to answer one simple question,
right?
Who am I?
if I have to leave town
you and my life to figure that out,
what does that say?
I know exactly who I am,
I'm just afraid to say it out loud...
I love you
so much.
I really do.
for me that means trying stuff out,
making mistakes.
But mistakes where I can take an incomplete
if things aren't working out,
not mistakes where other people's lives are riding on what I choose
I live to like you
and I can't like you anymore
i love you
when i get your heart splattered all over hell
just as i did it to you
don't run to me to help pull me back up
because, maybe,
for the first time in your life, I won't be there.
There are just certain people who aren't meant to fit in your life
no matter how much you want them to
Life has been screaming at us,
It's not meant to be.
I wish I could stay,
but the fact of the matter is
that that wouldn't be good for either one of us.
I've been away from home for too long,
and you...
you've been trying to find where you want be.
i already know your perfect
I'm slowing you down.
You'll find what you're looking for faster without me
I don't want to make you feel terrible anymore
if I don't go right now,
things are gonna change
You're leaving.
im leaving.
we are finally walking out that door.
because i know there's nothing I can do to change your mind
help me out of this mess.
I'm a stranger to myself,
but don't reach for me,
I'm too far away.
because maybe
there's nothing left to say.
to my love
give me your absence tonight.
Take all of your sympathy and leave it outside.
because there's no kind of loving that can make this all right.
I'm trying to find a place I belong
and I suddenly feel like a different person
So I'll ask you,
If I walked away right now,
would you come after me?




Copyright © derickkk ... [ 2014-07-15 07:29:52]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Heartfelt Contempt (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 15th July 2014 @ 10:17:48 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
A lot of good lines in this emotional write. Lots of questions that the reader wonders if answered.

Good work.

So here's some observations. You've posted seven poems but yet to read or comment on anyone else's writings....since 2008 no less! Isn't like you've never had the time.

YPDC is a great place. 99% of the poems are accepted in the general exhibition section. Yes, it is a great place. Part of what it makes it a great place is that people come on here and actually read poems and, like me, we also comment on them. We use our time not only to post but to read and comment. It would be a very sad and boring place if we were like you and just came on here to post poems and then leave. Imagine that. We only knew how to write poems and not how to read them. What would be the point? Post and, poof, gone. I could post fifty in one day because I am a premium member...pushing everyone's poems down the page...oh, wait, there is no one else...only me. Would be sad if we all only wrote and never even acknowledged the other poets here.



Do you see my point? What's the point of writing and sharing if no one reads? Sorta seems silly, does it not?



Take care,



Tim





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