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Which Love
Contributed by
mistee
on
Thursday, 24th April 2014 @ 01:32:29 AM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
In my heart the old love
Struggled with the new,
It was ghostly waking
All night through.
Dear things, kind things
That my old love said,
Ranged themselves reproachfully
Round my bed.
But I could not heed them,
For I seemed to see
Dark eyes of my new love
Fixed on me.
Old love, old love,
How can I be true?
Shall I be faithless to myself
Or to you?
Copyright ©
mistee
... [
2014-04-24 01:32:29]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Which Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by Invierno on
Thursday, 24th April 2014 @ 03:41:49 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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Holy smokes! What potential! The scene is perfect. The opposition is perfect. You have a gem in your hands.....polish it. I should very much like to see this reworked into the magnificent poem it's capable of being.
I spend time just staring off into the chem-trails, (haha) rolling concepts in my mind like so many marbles. I toss so many for their imperfections...out of round, colour off, chipped... I would keep this little marble. Great ideas are just as precious as great poems...it is from them which poems spring.
Do me a solid and send me the redo, if you choose to engage. My user name is invierno (winter in Spanish) |
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Re: Which Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Saturday, 26th April 2014 @ 12:42:29 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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I love what you have done here. Wonderful! Great way to wrap it up at the end. Keep it up:)
~Scorp |
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