|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
The Lifted Latch
Contributed by
puppy_dog_eyes
on
Friday, 28th February 2014 @ 06:15:26 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
This once warm vestibule chokes in its own embers
Only dust now flickers in the empty chambers
Footsteps echo footsteps that once were but are no more
Nothing but dry air scents the lost paradise
Cardboard boxes neatly stacked fill the last chapter
Life told in keepsakes and old faded photographs
I came to close the book, unwilling yet destined
The epilogue ridicules what the pages provided
Our existence is but a whisper in the dialogue of time
Fleeting as winter mist in the soul of the valley
History crammed into universal blink
A hallway of belongings to no longer belong
Eyes scout the shadows and the rubble of death
Replay the past through the warm vein of memory
Cool breeze strokes the cobwebs as dust fills the sky
The last page is written as the lifted latch falls
Copyright ©
puppy_dog_eyes
... [
2014-02-28 18:15:26]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: The Lifted Latch
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Friday, 28th February 2014 @ 06:38:39 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
my favorite line:"Our existence is but a whisper in the dialogue of time" i felt like i was standing in my great grama's room, this is so full of tangible images, so vivid! a beautiful write!
hugs n' love nessa |
|
|
Re: The Lifted Latch
(User Rating: 1 )
by northernlights on
Saturday, 1st March 2014 @ 01:33:53 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| I am standing there feeling the emptiness which does nothing to tell us about the life that has been.I also love ..... But a whisper in the dialogue of time and the melancholy you have created and the feeling of the latch falling in finality.Expressive tender detail written with wonderfully warm sensitivity cannot fail to take me there. |
|
|
Re: The Lifted Latch
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 1st March 2014 @ 09:53:44 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
well this is something hard to express at such a time but it goes through ones head, "eyes scout the shadows and the rubble of death
Replay the past through the warm vein of memory", this expresses my own thoughts when Mom passed. I sat looking out her window while all eight children sat in her tiny apartment on a very cold winter morning. A month before her passing I came to visit her by myself from far away, I took her to the store to buy grocery and medicine, then we stopped by McDonald's, and I remembered then how she would take me there once all by myself as a kid after a baseball game, and I held her hand as I thought back to those days. I always thought she was a beautiful woman
Anyway, sorry for going on, and on. your writing really struck a chord and I thank you!.
Peace! |
|
|
Re: The Lifted Latch
(User Rating: 1 )
by spud on
Tuesday, 4th March 2014 @ 05:01:21 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Hi
In our world of Poetry, envy is a compliment - make no mistake about it, because I wish I had
written this!
Stunning phraseology, beautifully crafted.
T
|
|
|
Re: The Lifted Latch
(User Rating: 1 )
by NoSaint on
Tuesday, 4th March 2014 @ 05:47:06 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| Wonderful imagery I lost my Mother last year and this brought back vivid images to me |
|
|
Re: The Lifted Latch
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Tuesday, 4th March 2014 @ 09:15:13 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| A really touching piece, Steve. It's great to read your work again. It brought back so many memories for me also.. Keep up the good job!! |
|
|
Re: The Lifted Latch
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 5th March 2014 @ 12:12:52 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
This poem evokes so many memories and emotions, it was difficult to comment on it. You definitely have a power in poetry with this one! I was so choked up, I couldn't comment at first and had to come back.
That is excellent writing! |
|
|
Re: The Lifted Latch
(User Rating: 1 )
by Invierno on
Monday, 10th March 2014 @ 12:55:00 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
A gorgeous capture of the ephemeral nature of our time here.
Expresses with perfection the sadness of how treasured items lose relevance with the passing of the holder.
Well done, and read with pleasure. |
|
|
Re: The Lifted Latch
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Saturday, 26th April 2014 @ 01:06:04 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Haunting and emotive. It is not a task to be envied. A sad reminder that life comes full circle. I really liked this line:
Our existence is but a whisper in the dialogue of time
Excellently summed up!
~Scorp |
|
|
Re: The Lifted Latch
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 19th August 2014 @ 05:23:42 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Most of a certain age will connect with your poem.
Each line is relevant and emotion-stirring. It would be hard to think of a piece that could deliver more to its subject.
In an excellently-worded poem, the line that haunted me the most was:' A hallway of belongings to no longer belong ' That creates a most poignant image. |
|
|
Re: The Lifted Latch
(User Rating: 1 )
by deadreckoning1983 on
Saturday, 6th December 2014 @ 08:42:46 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| Your writing is very impressive and thoughtful. your word choices are superb and your phrasings are well thought out. This was a very good poem and deserving of the same intent attention with which it was written. |
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Community
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
