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Good Night
Contributed by
katiejon
on
Sunday, 3rd March 2013 @ 09:32:01 AM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
I'm sitting here this moment, my mind at ease
It does not happen often, so this moment I'll seize
Most of the time I walk around blind,
not concentrating, my mind becomes twined
Twined in the past that I need not remember,
I push back the thought I will not encumber
I carry on with my day feeling bewildered,
my thoughts try to escape but I keep them censored
Censored away from all mankind
these terrible thoughts won't stay behind
Sometimes they arise and make life unbearable
but I will not share because they are terrible
When my day ends I take a deep breath,
sitting in my space thinking of the aftermath
I don't understand why my days are so hard
if people knew my thoughts, my mind would be barred
Barred from all, the whole human race
they might even say my mind's a disgrace
So, when my day is over I sleep and retrieve
This happy place I go to I never wanna leave
Good Night
Copyright ©
katiejon
... [
2013-03-03 09:32:01]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Good Night
(User Rating: 1 )
by Waynster on
Sunday, 3rd March 2013 @ 03:39:41 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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Hello Cate, Very awesome poem. Your words are very strong! I am actually wondering if you wrote this in third person, so that a reader could read about feelings you write about another person. (if you understand what i mean) Or if it is how you feel. Sometimes I write about how I feel, but I also write about feelings in a way where other people who feel that way can relate, and it might catch them and help them to change the direction of their thoughts!
Great write though!
Wayne |
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Re: Good Night
(User Rating: 1 )
by Sagefairy on
Monday, 4th March 2013 @ 11:06:55 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| It's a good description of depression. My thoughts don't get barred so much as I get un-empathetic reactions. You've got a good tack on the rhyme - almost a song there. Blessings, SF |
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